11/17/2025
whatâs coming up for you? đ
my daughter and i were excited for lunch after her swim lesson. when i ordered the ice cream with the meal, the associate asked me âare you sure you donât want the ice cream after the meal?!â to which i answered âno thank youâ and hereâs whyâŠ
when the food was brought over, my daughter reached for the ice cream first and so did i.
the messages i got when i shared this pic on my IG stories were things like âbut I canât believe you let her eat dessert firstâ or âI would never let my kid do thatâ and thatâs when i realized how *radical* it still feels to let anyone start with dessert
food holds no morality. ice cream isnât morally better or worse than chicken or broccoli. when all foods are on a level playing field, kids donât feel the need to hoard, sneak, binge, or obsess about it. they can just eat.
we were taught somewhere along the way in diet culture that we have to âearnâ our ice cream after the mealâŠwhen you REALLY think about itâŠWHY? who TF made up this rule?!
after a few bites of ice cream she looked at me and said iâm done. then she moved on to the french fries, mac and cheese, chicken, and split the entire cup of steamed broccoli with me.
we played a game called ânow you see it, now you donâtâ where we popped the broccoli into our mouths as fast as we could. there were giggles, connection, and there was zero pressure.
throughout the meal i would casually prompt her to check in with her belly. this is the heart of intuitive eating for kids AND adults. trust. autonomy. neutrality. play. connection. and sometimes that looks like starting with ice cream.
if this type of mealtime would bring up guilt or fear for you, youâre not alone. there is another way to feed yourself that doesnât revolve around rules or shame. comment âbenefit checkâ below for more info on how to get FREE support with our dietitian teamđ©”
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