04/20/2026
It sounds simple—but for many of us, it’s anything but.
It can be quite an “inconvenience” for the patriarchal world we live in to shake up the status quo by refusing to stay small and appease.
I’ve seen, both in my own life and in my work, how easy it is to lose touch with our inner knowing. Not because it isn’t there, but because we’ve been shaped—over time—to question it. To soften it. To override it in the name of being kind, accommodating, or “easy to be with.”
Many of us have had the experience of knowing something wasn’t right… and feeling our body go along with it anyway – usually to stay safe in the collective patriarchal waters we are swimming in.
As I am actively doing this work with myself in my own interpersonal arena, it’s interesting to notice that it’s translating into my somatic therapy practice. I now am working with many female-identified clients to find their voice, express their anger, and clarify their boundaries. This is the medicine the world needs right now, in my opinion.
That moment—where something in you says no, and something else takes over—that’s not a personal failure. It’s conditioning. It’s adaptation.
We learn to carry more than what belongs to us.
To stay open when something in us wants to close.
To say “yes” when our system is signaling “no.”
And anger—especially for women and femmes—often gets pushed to the edges. Misunderstood. Pathologized. Labeled as “too much,” or turned inward until it becomes something else entirely.
But what if anger isn’t the problem?
What if it’s a signal—an intelligent, protective force that helps you recognize when something isn’t aligned? That something you value is being intruded upon?
If you are a woman or femme, it is not your job to always be the emotional container for others. Nor should you then be labeled as a “b****” when you set a boundary after someone has prescribed that role to you without your consent.
In my practice, I work with women and femmes who are done abandoning themselves in these subtle ways—even if they’re not yet sure how to do it differently.