Black Hills Integrative Counseling & Coaching, LLC

03/30/2025

02/12/2025

When we rely on knowledge alone to understand our money, we leave much of our massive, sense-making brain and its sophisticated, comprehensive, and finally calibrated nervous system off the table. 
-Gayle Colman

09/13/2024

Yes!

What does the term "self-care" mean to you?

Do you associate it with being selfish, or self compassionate?

Ideally, when we are taking good care of ourselves, we have more of ourselves to give to our families, friends, jobs and society. When we are neglecting ourselves, we may feel like we have more to give until we don't, and have to play "catch up" until we are feeling well enough to give of ourselves again. It's a feedback loop, a cycle: give to yourself so you can give to others.

Where are you in this feedback loop currently? How much of yourself do you have to give? How much are you receiving in care?

At Thrive, we're in the business of helping people take care of themselves, and learn true self-compassion and self-care. If this is something you're interested in hearing more about, and are curious about how we work, reach out: 605-858-9571 and www.Thriveblackhills.com. We are certainly passionate about self-care!

09/10/2024

There are many paths to healing, and taking more than one approach can be helpful: counseling, workshops, bodywork, movement, art, spiritual practices, 12 step, group therapy,…

06/30/2024

The good news is that emotion regulation can be learned even later in life!

It may seem surprising that attachment and trauma would be interconnected, but once we understand more about the attachment system, it makes perfect sense. ⁠
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Trauma can overload the nervous system, making it more difficult to stay regulated. Emotional regulation is the ability to stay present and connected even in the face of hard feelings and experiences, as well as to cope with both the difficulties and pleasures of life. ⁠
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Emotional regulation is a skill that is taught, learned and practiced. People with secure attachment learned this skill through interactions with their caregivers, wiring it into the brain as a natural response to stress or trauma. ⁠
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In insecure attachment, however, children experience overwhelm and lack of safety, which creates a state of high alert (hyperarousal) or shutdown (hypoarousal) in the brain and nervous system. When they experience trauma or stress later in life, their brain typically defaults to this pattern of arousal, making emotional regulation more difficult. ⁠
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Rather than move toward attachment or repair, the tendency is to activate the threat response system and react with “fight, flight, freeze or fawn.” ⁠
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The good news is that secure attachment and emotional regulation can be learned and practiced. And, over time, our bodies and brains will begin to naturally choose more adaptive patterns and behaviors!⁠
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- Dr. Diane Poole Heller⁠
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02/29/2024

The chronic negation of one’s authentic experience can be fatal.
-Gabor Maté

08/19/2023

Addiction is not a disease or the product of bad choices.

05/13/2023

The conflict between attachment and authenticity is a matter of life or death, and not just when we are babies.

You can watch all our videos at https://scienceandnonduality.comFrom the new 9-part video series Reclaiming Authenticity: Conversations with Dr. Gabor MatéIn...

02/20/2023

A few months ago I was a guest on a podcast episode hosted by my friend, financial therapist and advisor Ed Coambs. Here’s an overview. Have a listen!

From working with things to working with people (02:30)
Unpacking “financial therapy” (05:30)
Common themes and issues faced by Sarah’s clients (10:15)
Baking aspirations into a cashflow plan (15:03)
Discussing “trauma reenactment” (18:00)
How fear of judgment impacts people’s ability to face their own financial life (22:30)
Working with couples, individually (27:50)
Becoming financially responsible (31:41)
Finding balance in your financial life and giving yourself permission to overcorrect (35:08)
Helping people find their voice when they feel voiceless around money (37:48)

Today, Ed is joined by financial therapist Sarah Swantner, founder of Black Hills Integrative Counseling & Coaching, LLC in South Dakota. Sarah is trained in both personal finance and mental health counseling. For the first decade of her professional life, she worked as a mechanical...

02/01/2023

I’ve found this to be true. And also, the more we try to avoid what it feels like when we are not ok, the less ok we feel.

“The more okay we are when we are not okay, the more okay we are.”
~ Adyashanti
The Collapse of Wanting
https://bit.ly/3Fh8xIx