Anna's Hope LLC

11/29/2023

Toxic positivity invalidates life experiences that ignite trauma response. There is a place for positive reframing- not until the environment is safe, the person feels that space is held and he/she/they feel heard, seen, valued, and feels are felt.

07/19/2023

Excellent training for community members!

Tomorrow night … FREE trauma informed community training… Restoring Hope: Trauma 101 - Understanding Healing & Hope with Brain Science…

Registration closes today at 5pm. Join us!

07/16/2022

11/19/2021

Exactly

03/14/2021

💜

This. Hits. Hard.

The inability to receive support from others is a trauma response.

Your “I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself” conditioning is a survival tactic. And you needed it to shield your heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you.

From the parent who was absent and abandoned you by choice or the parent who was never home from working three jobs to feed and house you.

From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but never offered a safe haven that honored your heart.

From the friendships and family who ALWAYS took more than they ever gave.

From all the situations when someone told you “we’re in this together” or “I got you” then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when s**t got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too.

From all the lies and all the betrayals.

You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point.

Extreme-independence IS. A. TRUST. ISSUE.

You learnt: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will ALWAYS drop the ball EVENTUALLY right?

You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt ancestors who came before you.

Extreme-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak.

So, you don’t trust anyone.

And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people.

To trust is to hope, to trust is to be vulnerable.

“Never again,” you vow.

But no matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall.

Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either.

Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming.

It’s a trauma response.

The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed.

You are worthy of having support.
You are worthy of having true partnership.
You are worthy of love.
You are worthy of having your heart held.
You are worthy to be adored.
You are worthy to be cherished.
You are worthy to have someone say, “You rest. I got this.” And actually deliver on that promise.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy.

You don’t have to earn it.
You don’t have to prove it.
You don’t have to bargain for it.
You don’t have to beg for it.

You are worthy.
Worthy.
Simply because you exist.

-Jamila White,
-photo credit: Randy Orange

09/18/2020

Does anyone want to guess why?

Sis, the inability to receive support from others is a trauma response.

Your “I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself” conditioning is a survival tactic. You needed it to shield your tender heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you.

From the parent who was absent by choice or by the circumstance of working three jobs to feed and house you.

From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but no offered no safe haven that honored your heart.

From the friendships that always took more than they gave.

From all the situations when someone told you “we’re in this together” then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when isht got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too.

From the lies. The betrayals.

You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point.

Ultra-independence is a *trust issue.*

You learned: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will always drop the ball sooner or later, right?

You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt women who came before you.

Ultra-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak.

So, you don’t trust anyone.

And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people.

To trust is to hope, to trust is vulnerability.

“Never again,” you vowed.

But no matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall.

Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either.

Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming.

It’s trauma response.

The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed.

You are worthy of having support.
You are worthy of having true partnership.
You are worthy of love.
You are worthy of having your heart held.
You are worthy to be adored.
You are worthy to be cherished.

You are worthy to have someone say, “You rest. I got this.” And actually deliver on that promise.

You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy.
Worthy, sis.
You are worthy.

You don’t have to earn it.
You don’t have to prove it.
You don’t have to bargain for it.
You don’t have to beg for it.

You are worthy.
Worthy.

Simply because you exist.

I love you. 🧡~J.

Credit: Written by Jamila White - Psychic, Life Coach, Author (FB: http://fb.me/inspiredjamila, IG: .jamila) Original image by Rising Woman, reposted from The Womb Sauna.

Permission to share/repost is gladly granted as long as:
1. It is kept in its original, unedited form; and
2. Full authorship credit is given with my name. A link/tag is appreciated.
Thank you!

08/12/2020

No other words needed. I just had this conversation with another warrior this morning and with one last evening. When we walk through the pain and release it, we empower our inner most self becoming our warrior selves- our thriving selves. Traumas can sometimes interfere with our remembering to lean into and trust ourselves, to take care of ourselves, to remember that right here/right now we have the power to keep ourselves safe in this moment.

As women, we can recognize and communicate with our warrior goddesses that we are proud of their power, that we stand with them when they forget about their power, and that we love them through the mud- we are women warriors- hear us roar!

06/02/2020

Social Work is political. We are change agents. If you are a social worker and you are not addressing this, you are not doing your job. Photo is Courtesy of A beautiful woman and colleague.

04/18/2020

Services still provided by the following agencies. Since quarantine domestic violence, child abuse, and substance use increased. Please reach out for help.

These agencies are still helping victims of domestic violence, and other victims, during this pandemic. Police are still responding. The courts are still issuing Protection From Abuse Orders. There is help. Please reach out if you need it.