Enamory, San Diego, CA (2025)

11/25/2025

Traditional couples therapy can get stuck in the same loops. Same fights. Same distance. Same painful stories beneath it all.

I am not enough.
I am alone.
My partner does not understand me.

KAP helps you step out of that pattern. Its dissociative effects create an observer perspective so you can finally see the cycle instead of being trapped inside it. It becomes both of you and the therapist looking at the pattern together and learning to shift it.

In that space there is more openness, empathy and flexibility. You can actually take in your partner’s perspective as something human instead of something threatening.

Real change starts when couples stop fighting the pattern and finally see it clearly.

11/24/2025

Next virtual training: Feb 28th-Mar 1st

We train therapists to deliver Couples’ KAP— a groundbreaking approach to relationship healing.

Through our training, you’ll learn how to conduct a thorough assessment, identify the core patterns couples get stuck in, and define treatment targets and mechanisms of change. You’ll gain hands-on experience with preparation and feedback sessions, explore the different dosing models (and when and why to use each), and master integration techniques grounded in evidence-based couple therapy strategies.

By the end, you’ll know how to help couples create real, lasting change — both within themselves and their relationships.

Have questions? Reach out anytime.

💫 Comment KAP below for the direct registration link and to get 30% off with early-bird pricing.

11/23/2025

Let’s talk about conflict styles, because how you fight matters more than how often you fight.

Here’s how common conflict management styles actually rank (in my opinion) when it comes to creating healthy relationships

Conflict doesn’t have to divide you. Done right, it can actually bring you closer.

11/22/2025

Comment “KAP” for the direct registration link!

If you want to learn how to skillfully guide couples through KAP, this training will give you the full roadmap:

• Couples’ KAP assessment + case formulation
• Preparation and feedback sessions
• Dyadic psyched*lic and psycholytic dosing models
• How to safely guide a couple through a journey
• Integration focused on shifting core relationship patterns

Virtual Format
February 28 – March 1
Join us and deepen your clinical toolkit for relational healing.

11/19/2025

One of the clearest signs of emotional abuse isn’t yelling or manipulation. It’s when you start lying or hiding things just to “keep the peace.”

When it stops feeling safe to be honest, you begin wearing a mask. Small mistakes feel dangerous and vulnerability turns into a risk. And honesty starts to fade away.

If you’re avoiding hard conversations because they’re uncomfortable, that’s something you can work through together with empathy and accountability.

But if you’re avoiding them because honesty leads to chaos, instability, or fear, that’s a different story.

Love shouldn’t make you hide. It should make you feel safe enough to be seen.

11/15/2025

If your partner cheated and you still want to stay, here are three questions you need to ask yourself first 👇

1️⃣ Is my partner taking real accountability? That means acknowledging the harm, offering a sincere apology, and changing their behavior. Without all three, healing can’t begin.

2️⃣ Are we both willing to do the work to heal? Infidelity doesn’t come out of nowhere. It grows in the blind spots of disconnection. Healing requires both people leaning in, facing the pain, and rebuilding trust together.

3️⃣ What kind of commitment do we actually want? For many couples, this moment becomes a chance to redefine what loyalty, integrity, and safety mean for them.

These questions won’t guarantee reconciliation but they will guarantee honesty.

And that’s where real healing starts.

11/11/2025

Sleeping in separate rooms doesn’t mean your relationship is falling apart.
Sometimes, it’s actually what saves it.

We’ve been taught that sharing a bed equals closeness, and that not doing so means distance. But the truth is, rest is a form of love too.

If one of you snores, works night shifts, or struggles with insomnia, choosing sleep might be the most caring decision you can make because rested people connect better, communicate better, and love better.

The key is staying intentional:

💤 Make time for touch, affection, and closeness.

🤍 Cuddle before bed, hold each other skin to skin, kiss without pressure.

🌙 Let touch simply be touch, not a gateway to s*x.

That’s how you build safety, connection, and yes, even better intimacy.

11/09/2025

If your relationship feels boring, it’s probably not the spark that’s gone.
It’s your nervous system adjusting to calm after years of chaos.

Unpredictable love feels addictive because it’s full of highs and lows. This is the same pattern that fuels gambling.
But real intimacy grows in safety, not in instability.

If you’re craving excitement, don’t break what’s healthy.
Add intentional risk. Explore new experiences together, bring novelty into stability, and become adventurous within a safe container.

✨ The goal isn’t to chase chaos, it’s to find aliveness within calm.

11/07/2025

One of the strangest things about being in a healthy relationship?

You might still think about other people or other possible lives.

We grow up believing that once we find “the one,” everyone else just fades away.

But that’s not how desire works. You’re human. You’re curious. Your mind wonders, imagines, and explores “what ifs.”

That doesn’t mean you’re broken or that your relationship is.
Thoughts are just thoughts. They don’t always reflect your truth or your intentions.

Real commitment isn’t the absence of attraction to others.
It’s choosing your partner again and again, knowing you could choose anyone else.

That’s not weakness.
That’s love: conscious, alive, and human.

11/05/2025

One of the biggest myths about polyamory is that jealousy means you’re doing it wrong.

But jealousy isn’t the enemy. It’s information. It shows you what matters, what you need, and where your insecurities live.

There are many shades of jealousy:

💛 Feeling left out, wanting to be included.

💬 Comparison. Questioning your own worth.

💔 Fear of abandonment. Worrying they’ll choose someone else.

🌀 Possessiveness. Craving exclusivity.

Each feeling points toward something to understand, not to suppress.

People who do polyamory well don’t avoid jealousy.
They work with it finding compersion, reassurance, and connection.

11/04/2025

There are several common reasons people hesitate to start couple therapy.

1. Fear of Blame or Judgment
Many people worry that therapy will turn into a “who’s right” or “who’s wrong” conversation. One partner may fear being ganged up on by the therapist or blamed for the relationship’s struggles. Others fear having to admit painful truths about themselves or the relationship.

2. Shame and Vulnerability
Seeking help can trigger feelings of failure—especially for high-functioning or achievement-oriented couples. There’s often a belief that “we should be able to fix this ourselves,” and the idea of needing help can feel like weakness or defeat.

3. Hopelessness or Avoidance
Some couples wait until they’re emotionally exhausted or already considering separation. By that point, one or both partners may feel it’s “too late,” so therapy feels like a formality rather than a genuine opportunity for change. Avoidance—of conflict, emotion, or accountability—is a major barrier.

4. Uneven Motivation
Often, one partner wants therapy more than the other. The less-motivated partner might fear being pressured to change, or may not believe therapy works. This imbalance can create friction before the first session even happens.

5. Fear of Change
Even though people want things to improve, change can feel destabilizing. Therapy can reveal hidden dynamics or ask couples to communicate in new ways, and that can feel risky if the relationship’s equilibrium—however painful—is familiar.

6. Practical Barriers
Cost, scheduling, childcare, and access to a qualified therapist can all make it harder to start. For some, especially in certain cultures or communities, stigma about therapy still plays a role.

7. Past Negative Experiences
If someone has had an unhelpful or invalidating experience in therapy before, they may assume all therapy will be like that. Mistrust of the process or the profession can linger for years.

11/03/2025

You’re probably tired of hearing that “love looks very different from fairytales” when it’s used to justify unhealthy patterns or even toxic behaviors. However, healthy love can also look different from what we imagine. So here are three things to keep in mind about healthy love:

☝🏼 You don’t lose yourself. You stay whole while choosing each other.

✌🏼You don’t chase constant butterflies. You build the kind of peace that feels like home.

👉🏻 And yes, it takes work, but the kind that nourishes instead of drains you.

Healthy relationships aren’t effortless. They’re intentional.

Enamory

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