03/12/2026
๐จ Public Announcement from your local Massage Therapist ๐จ
Let me say this loud enough for the people in the backโฆ
If you book a massage with me hoping Iโm going to massage your p***c area, you have made a very poor life decision.
This is a professional massage practice, not a shady back-alley โspa.โ
What you can ask for:
โ๏ธ Back work
โ๏ธ Neck work
โ๏ธ Glutes
โ๏ธ Professional hip flexor or psoas trigger point work
What you cannot ask for:
โ Anything sexual
โ Anything creepy
โ Anything that makes me question how you were raised
If you do decide to shoot your shot anyway, congratulations โ youโve unlocked a bonus service:
โจ An immediate end to your session
โจ A permanent ban from my table
โจ And possibly a new conversation with the local police department ๐
After 20 years in this profession, my tolerance for nonsense is lower than my massage table.
To my amazing, respectful clients โ I adore you and love helping your bodies heal. โค๏ธ
To the creepy ones reading this and thinking โmaybe she doesnโt mean meโโฆ
Oh, I absolutely do!!!!