Heal Your Health - Laura Underwood, Owner and author of this little autobiography:)
My story is a long and misled tale. As I began my career, I became a personal trainer, aerobic instructor (all kinds of fitness classes) and a yoga and pilates instructor. I mainly taught in recreation centers, I really loved that clientele, and I was dedicated to my craft and my clients. I believed in what I was teaching, and all of my patrons were buying what I was selling! Exercise:
All the exercise I executed (which was a lot) was very important and needed in my own mind! According to the fitness industry, exercise is the solution to dealing with stress, feeling empowered, losing body fat, and fixing sore joints. I think differently now. The truth is, exercise is actually a stressor, the empowerment is fleeting, in order to fix sore joints, you have to know exactly what to do, and the same applies for fat loss. The concept of eat less and move more is antiquated & for the most part, unsuccessful. Dieting:
Ugh - maybe you feel the same way. I yo yo dieted all through my 20's, 30's, and half of my 40's. Lets see, there was Paleo, Liquid Amino, (a 500 calorie a day diet) there was low carb and low fat, Keto, liquid diets, cleanses, lifestyles... and the list goes on. Literally, I was on a diet for 25 years. I knew diets didn’t work (at least not for me) but it was the only tool I knew to get my body lean, because I always gained the weight back. I was probably about 46 years old when I was on a diet that was very tightly macro nutrient oriented. It required me to do a lot of food journaling and macro counting to help me gain muscle mass without gaining weight. Oh my gosh! I was so sick of it. If I gained a half a pound, I was devastated, dieting was too much work to gain weight! I finally said to myself - “I am never going to diet again, I’m done.” And that was it, I never looked back again. Results:
Because I had utterly destroyed my metabolism, I had to repair it - by eating. It was really hard, almost devastating to me. I slowly gained 20 pounds over the next two years. Like I said - HARD! Not hard to gain the weight, but emotionally sad and depressing, my self esteem had been based on the Western fitness and nutrition paradigms! It's your fault if you gain the weight back, if you stuck to it you wouldn't. Those thoughts, making me so judgmental of myself kept me on this track of unworthiness for a very long time. After the two years, I finally stopped gaining weight and began the work of accepting myself where I was, how I was, and learning how to love myself as I am — that’s a lot of work too. Until you really work at anything, you don’t truly understand how you have been influenced (brainwashed). When I learned that it is the diet and nutrition industries that put out an inferior product (a diet) that doesn't work, it changed my whole mind set. I started learning about the non-diet culture, and I became proud of myself! I was on the other side of practically anorexic behaviors, I had healed my metabolism, I ate food and I was ok. As I look back, I wonder why we all feel like we have to villify fat as much as we do. My body:
It was really tight! I had been working in the fitness industry for 25 years. As I had stated before, I was on a diet and fitness plan to gain muscle and to eat so I wouldn't lose/gain weight. I was lifting as heavy as I could every day! I had a friend that would always ask me, ”Why do you walk like a man?" Ya, that’s awesome. I was just doing what I do. It's what leaders in the fitness industry do. They keep getting stronger, and more lean. I considered myself a holistic individual, but I was blind to my lack of humanism and eccentricities. So now, It’s been 3 years of de-stressing my musculoskeletal system through actual muscle releasing, not massage, It is very painful, but it does work. I have incorporated a different fitness regime and a different paradigm. I started studying late 1800's philosophers to understand my brain more, how to clean up my thinking. Through my un-brainwashing process, I became non-judgmental towards myself, I not only started releasing all of the tight muscles, I learned truths, spiritual laws, the power of positive thinking, and what unconditional love really is. I had been working way too hard. My nervous system:
I focused so much time on fitness and dieting that my nervous system became stressed out. My mind focused on hating myself because I had not become what I wanted to become. Continuing to try diets that hurt me. Not being able to stick to them. Inner freaking out and being disgusted with myself took its tole! Of course it would! Now I spend time calming my nervous system. I stretch a lot more, I have learned workout techniques to keep me from tightening up, and eating what I want, when I want. You may think that this is a recipe for disaster, but its not because I have learned to accept myself! I don't have to weigh myself any more! I find that it throws me off even if it is a loss in weight, and besides, it doesn't matter. When the nervous system becomes over/under active it is always a symptom of a much deeper, ignored, emotional issue causing the nervous system to attack the body. What that looks like is different for each individual. We need to find those deeper issues. This is why I have been studying meditation, hypnotherapy, tapping for weight loss, the brain sciences and emotional releasing techniques. it has to be included in anyone's healing transformation or there won't be a transformation. I did everything wrong. I tried to fix stress levels, emotional issues, and physical problems with the exercise and nutrition paradigms, and this lifestyle is simply not sustainable. Why? It may not be what you think. True love and self-esteem does not come from the outside in. I exercise, so I feel better, I eat right, so I don’t feel fat...and the list goes on. You’re trying to fix a problem or an emotion by taking an outward “solution” and placing it upon yourself. The true solution is to love yourself just as you are. Allow yourself to spiritually connect, and then, and only then, we will all be able to sustainably change. I believe and have faith that this is how God (or the Universe, or whatever your belief system is) works, and I support this cause. As a result of mine, and many other’s experiences, I only teach functional exercise, taught in a way that will not result in tight muscles. (There’s a whole method to that) I have learned to teach softer yoga classes and have added nervous system calming exercises, meditation, and hypnotherapy to release paradigms and judgements that do not serve anyone. My hope is that we can learn to love ourselves the way we are, both physically and mentally. Honestly - I didn’t know if I could do it, but I have come a long way. How did I and many of my clients transform? I’ll tell you: The physical arts, nervous system training, love, acceptance, body kindness, intuitive eating, the brain sciences, and emotional and physical healing. The goal is to turn everyone inward and move outward with confidence. It’s how we find our health in all aspects of our lives. Hence, why my company is named Heal Your Health. Come join the love! Anxiety:
What I have found is that anxious people have been in their heads so much that other connections have been lost. For instance, one individual, because of pain and anxiety, couldn’t perform an ankle circle to his expectations, and this caused an immediate anxious response. Step by step we worked on it, and when the connections were ignited, his life became less anxious. It's a work of love and a process of all the above mentioned tools that he, and others, have achieved great progress and have moved forward in their lives. This spiritual/emotional/physical path is going to require courage. The French word “cour” means, wisdom of the heart. When you are following the heart and using intuition, you may find it necessary to face things that might be a little challenging/scary. The goal is to move forward, perhaps into the unknown, knowing that fear is a good thing that gives you an opportunity to grow! It is your best friend. Release judgement. Conclusion:
Through consistent work, I have watched people release and let go of their unhelpful paradigms and become stronger within themselves. So, my advice to you is to keep loving yourself, keep trying, and never give up. Find your bliss. I Love you!!
