A Hopeful Mountain

04/17/2026

Thank you Kendra. That was the quintessential picture!🤣 The silver platter. 😂 And the outcome we need. I used “path” just to remind Shannon about her wedding toast,

Friendship, to me, works best like an ensemble cast.
No main character—just a group where we all get our moments to shine.

Be aware of the person who gets it done. And a little warning… it’s not always who you think. Rarely is it me.
The quiet ones? Pay attention to them. Not because they’re diabolical, but because vulnerability doesn’t come easy for them.

That’s something I’m working on too—listening. Just listening.
Hearing without needing to fix.

These kinds of groups aren’t perfect. There are problems.
Sometimes it’s me—I own that.

But let’s be real—people often see exactly who I am (I mean… how could you not?) and still choose to step into my world, consciously or not.

So don’t cross my boundaries and act surprised.
We just met—you knew what you were walking into.

I’ve been showing up as myself for over ten years.
No confusion there.

So let’s not play the victim.
Own your choices.

Am I a little crazy? Absolutely.
But also delightful—and, most importantly, an independent thinker

04/17/2026

Not me…. I sleep like a log.

04/17/2026

04/17/2026

Last week, METAvivor lost a dear friend, Leslie Falduto. A former board member, Leslie always showed up and did the work. She brought her energy and heart to everything she touched and lived fully and with joy. Her race is over, but her spirit and impact will stay with all who had the privilege of knowing her. She will be deeply missed.

Read more about Leslie here: metavivor.org/leadership/leslie-falduto/

04/17/2026

Shannon did not care for the one. It was a gem!

04/16/2026

Eeeeeeeee

04/16/2026

I always learn the hard way too

04/16/2026

How I survive gaslighting.

Man, oh man… I am learning some things this time around that are leveling me up.

You know why isolation can be good? Because God sends you what you need, when you need it. And when there are too many cooks in the kitchen—too many opinions, too many voices—you lose your own. Sometimes you have to clear the kitchen.

See, people never stop giving their opinions. Each of us has our own story. But maybe my experience can help you see yours more clearly.

It’s not our hearts that are so delicate and easy to break.
It’s our minds.

The mind is delicate when it’s hurt. The wound oozes, and then it scars. And somehow, that scar reaches the heart. That’s not an exaggeration—I’m living it in real time.

So here’s what you need to know to protect yourself:

Trust your gut.

This isn’t my first rodeo. I notice my signals. That moment when my breath catches and drops straight into my stomach—I know something isn’t right. I store that.

But then I ask myself:
Is this strong intuition… or am I overcorrecting?

Because here’s the truth:
Your nervous system becomes more sensitive to threat, exclusion, or control dynamics when you’re under stress.

And that takes us to the real question…

What are your stressors?

What was I dealing with?

Just off the top:
• new marriage
• new family
• never having had kids (and loving them)
• a difficult co-parenting situation
• my business failed
• moving
• farming being way harder than I expected
• honoring commitments while John did Mamma Mia
• time apart that was hard
• my farming dream struggling
• questioning my purpose—did I even want to teach yoga anymore? maybe that’s all I’m good at… and then feeling like I failed at that too

Yeah… that’s a lot.

So yes—I had a tough season. That was maybe 20% of my life during that time.

But the foundation? Strong.

Because the other 80% was:
love,
understanding,
learning each other,
laughing,
experiencing new things together,
even things we’d done before—but never together,
attraction, connection.

There was—and is—far more good than bad.

But you still have to deal with the bad.
So why not shoot for the stars?

Have a stable partner or support system. And if you see something that could become a problem—say it. Early. And say it every time it shows up.

My center is God. You be you—but especially in family, I believe in talking about covenants.

Because I’ll be honest—my communication is not great when I’m really upset. So I bring God into it. And the next time something hits, yes, my emotions are high—but I have more confidence.

Why?

Because I stop and ask:
Whose lane is this?

Am I interfering? No.
Am I asking for help appropriately? Yes.

Then I ask the harder question:
Is this person intentionally—or subconsciously—trying to break me?

Make a list, my friends.
Write it out.

Every instance. Every time someone used information you trusted them with. Every moment that felt like a betrayal.

Gaslighters—directly or indirectly—attack.
They sometimes send “flying monkeys,” people who don’t even realize they’re being used.

Pay attention.

When you’re bonding with someone, notice who is sharing more. It should be balanced. If it’s not—be aware.

For me, seeing it written out takes away its power.

So I asked:
“What are the chances I’m imagining this?”

And the answer was:
• 0% chance my feelings came from nothing
• Low chance that everything is imagined
• Moderate chance that some meanings or motives are being interpreted through my lens

That’s the honest middle ground.