11/14/2025
Story Time..... Short story written by some guy....
Once upon a time there was a simple man who was navigating through some very difficult challenges in his life. He was a unique man because he had a mixture of strength and yet tenderness, of focus and precision yet openness and flow, of thought and yet of feelings. He was both okay and not okay at the same time, shouldering the responsibility and leadership of many sacred souls who trust him and find comfort in his alleged wisdom but also whom find comfort in his flawed humanity and rawness. He was a paradox, a dichotomy, a blend of masculine and feminine energy. He was a rare being.
On a random free afternoon in the middle of the week, he found himself in an opportunity to leave work early. As he started his journey, he was aware that he could not go home, for home was quiet and where his thoughts and feelings catch up with him, where he was reminded of a life that once was while trying to reforge a new life and existence. So, he found himself in a dilemma. Where should he go?
He thought that he would take a random drive in his car to listen to music, to appreciate nature, and to surprise his son with a visit at his son's new job. But alas, in his mind, in his overactive but attentive and aware mind, everywhere he goes holds some bitter-sweet memory of joy and of sadness. His son's new job was located in a nearby town that would bring this man very close to a place that held memories of a person that no longer exists on this earth, and also, of a person whom this man experienced a beautiful connection with but now there is distance between them. Distance that may or may not be permanent, distance that was not this man's choice, and distance that is beyond his knowledge or comprehension of what is to be determined or what has already been written. But that is a chapter in another book, a book only written in this man's soul and he keeps in the quiet corners of his heart only to himself.
So, he faced another dilemma, does he continue to travel to that town and have a mixture of emotions, or does he find another place to travel to, or does he surrender and go home? He chose to do what he historically learned to do in his life, he chose the difficult path that would lead to growth. Namely, he faced these emotions head on, traveling to the area that brings him to a space and awareness of both joy and of pain. He leaned into the challenge. He drove in his car, enjoying the sunlight, enjoying the machine he was in, enjoying the sound system that he customized to meet his acoustic needs. He was tearful in some moments and in other moments, a small smile almost emerged from his lips, but only in a micro-millimeter. He had a good visit with his son and took a tour around the motorcycle shop. The son, the young man, navigating through his own pain and healing, got to show the man a glimpse into the new world that he was creating for himself.
When the man left the visit, he felt that the trip was unfinished. He did not feel ready to go home, and yet he did not know where to go next. He knew that he should be careful to not torture himself too much and he knew to resist all urges to find that special person to see if he could be in her presence. So, he navigated to a store he remembered that had interesting items.
As he walked in, he was slammed with the memory and reality of his last visit while he was enjoying that connection several months prior. He thought to himself, another opportunity for growth and to face things. But he also thought that his soul was tired of these "opportunities", and he wasn't sure how much more his strong but tender heart could endure. He walked around the store like a zombie for a bit, half present in the moment and the other half replaying memories like scenes from a movie. As he gathered a few items to purchase, he stood in line for a long time, practicing patience (a skill that he had learned to behave in but a skill that was not natural to his being). He eventually looked down at the items in his hand and he realized that they were just chotskies-a yiddish word for trinkets or knickknacks-essentially unnecessary things. He realized that he was filling and occupying his mind with nonsense, the equivalent of when people emotionally eat to comfort themselves. It was not a big deal, or a big cost to him, but he realized nonetheless that he had an opportunity to simply "let go". To accept that they were not important or needed items (they brought no real comfort or purpose) and that he could adapt and adjust by putting them back. So, that is what he did. A prior version of himself may have felt frustrated with himself for "wasting time" or even frustrated with himself for being "anxious" or "overthinking" or "indecisiveness". But in this version of himself, he simply had an awareness of a blindspot that got illuminated in him. It gave him an opportunity to see that the real motivation in that trip was to connect with his son and to allow himself to feel the complex feelings that he always feels anyway, but this time with more intention and purpose. He realized that going to that store, which was the only place he found good bath salt to use in his tub, was really about trying to connect with the special person and connection that was now broken and distant.
He left the store, continued on his journey and sat in the duality of himself, his life, the past, the present, the future, and the multiple timelines that he existed in. He felt a little bit of pride in himself, a little bit of growth perhaps, and an inch or two closer to existing in the space that he professes about Radical Acceptance and surrendering to things beyond his control.
So why is this story tale being told?... Especially from this writer who is very creative but whom tends to not share. Is he writing fiction? Is it for entertainment? Is it to offer inspiration? Is it to spark the reader's own thoughts about their journey? Let's start by clarifying what it is NOT. It is NOT written from the perspective of the Fresh Prince of Bel Air...."Now this is a story about how my life got flipped turned upside down..." Nor, is this story written as any covert message to the special person/character referenced in it. It is, however, shared with the intention that there is value to forging ahead even when it is dark and you have lost your bearings, even when things seem bleak. As the saying goes, "it's darkest before the dawn". The reader is left to their own heart and their own creativity to craft their own narrative; to glean whatever they wish to about this story. It is the hope of this writer that any soul reading this may see the value of facing things, leaning into difficult and challenging times, and getting into more active alignment and awareness within the self to operate with purpose and intention....all while learning to adapt to constant change and to hold onto the awareness (not just hope) that things are constantly evolving. We are on this earth for whatever time we are here, to experience this wild ride. All of the joy, the love, the excitement, the connections, and also the pain, the tragic, the complex, and the devastating. Find ways to operate in simplicity and peace, while also taking risks, while allowing yourself to connect with others, while experiencing everything life has to offer even if you know that it can or will lead to pain or loss. And, learn to put down things that are not needed or things that no longer serve. Essentially shedding old ways of being. Whether they be chotskies in a store (unless they bring comfort and joy of course), or whether they be old patterns, old stories, or fear based ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving.
