12/15/2025
🌊Divorce Doesn’t Define Your Teen’s Future ✨
Carrie here - Teen + Young Adult Coach! ✨☕️
When a child walks through divorce, it can feel overwhelmingly heavy even if they don’t show it. I know this firsthand. As a teen, I brushed everything off and acted like none of it bothered me. Life went on as “normal,” and I never gave myself permission to feel anything. ❤️🩹
But the truth is, I was hurting and grieving. I suppressed those emotions for years, and by the time I reached my 20s and someone finally asked me how I processed the divorce, I could barely speak. Everything I had buried came crashing to the surface.
I’m so grateful for the relationship I have with my parents today. They did the best they could with what they knew, and I love them deeply. This isn’t a post to shame them or any parent for that matter - it’s about offering guidance so you can support your teen as they navigate something that reshapes their world. 🌎
👇 Here are some of my best tips to supporting your child/teen through a divorce:
1. Keep emotional check-ins simple and consistent. 🌿
Kids don’t need deep conversations every day — they need predictable space. Try gentle invitations like, “How’s your heart today?” or “Anything feeling heavy?” If they don’t open up, don’t push. Let them set the depth.
2. Validate what they feel, not what you wish they’d feel. ❤️
Anger, sadness, confusion, silence — all of it is normal. It’s common for parents to feel guilt or grief during a divorce, but try not to let those emotions shape how you respond to your child’s emotions. Your job isn’t to fix their feelings, but to make them feel safe sharing them.
3. Maintain rhythms and structure where you can. ☀️
Divorce brings instability, so consistency becomes grounding. Keep morning routines, bedtime rituals, and predictable weekend plans as steady as possible. Familiar rhythms help them feel secure when other things are shifting.
4. Never speak negatively about your ex in front of your child. 🗣️
Even small comments can make a child feel caught in the middle. Reassure them: “You never have to choose sides or take care of my feelings.” Even if the other parent doesn’t model this, hold your boundary. Process your own hurt with a trusted adult, not your child.
5. Stay united in communication — even if you’re no longer united in relationship. 🤝
Sometimes, in an attempt to feel in control of this unpredictable life change, kids may test boundaries or create tension by passing messages between parents or exaggerating situations. Respond with calm and clarity. Communicate directly with the other parent (not through your child), verify facts before reacting, and gently remind your teen, “You don’t have to carry information for us. We handle that.”
I’m rooting for healing for you and your family this Christmas season.
🤍 Carrie
