http://www.lifein4partharmony.com/

The Living Source, Upper Montclair, NJ (2025)

07/15/2025

“Say Yes.”

Within a week, I heard this guidance from 3 different leaders. But if you’re an overwhelmed, chronic over-doer, you might be feeling triggered reading these words.

You may have been doing your best to “Say No”. And now you’re remembering the stress, anxiety or worry you felt because you agreed to too many things.

I know that place where every part of you wants to just say no and feel good about saying it.

Believe me, this” Say Yes” guidance is totally aligned with your “Say No” plan.

Think of Yes and No as partners.

𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒘𝒆’𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒙𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒔, 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚, 𝒘𝒆’𝒓𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒔𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒐 𝒕𝒐 𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒔. It’s one of the most well-worn pathways to chronic stress and burnout.

Once we start saying no to self-neglect and draining our resources, we’re saying yes to what sustains us. That’s the “yes” we want.

Each of the leaders that I listened to encourage their audience to identify one small thing they could do to get closer to an important goal within the next week. When we’re stressed beyond our limit, small steps can make a big difference in our well-being and growth.

So, what’s your “Yes” and “No”?

It could be saying yes to naps and no to days where you don’t stop to recharge. Or maybe it’s no to working late nights at your computer and yes to a good book or audio bedtime story that brings you peaceful sleep. Or maybe there’s some support that you’re ready to say yes to while you say no to trying to handle it all alone.

What will it be? Please share your Yes and No in the comments.

𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐘𝐞𝐬 – 𝐍𝐨 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬.

04/02/2025

My octogenarian Mama says when she was growing up, April Fool’s Day was one of her favorite days. She laughed thinking about the jokes she and her friends played on each other.

One of things I love about my Mama is her laugh. When she’s really tickled about something, she can’t get words out to describe what’s funny. Her laughter repeatedly interrupts her storytelling. In less that 60 seconds, you’re doubled over in laughter too.

Our conversation reminded me that April Fool’s Day and Stress Awareness Month have April 1 in common. Perhaps this is the making of great collaboration. We can kick off the month rediscovering how joy and connection with others are powerful resources for calming our nervous system.

This is akin to what Deb Dana calls “glimmers”, little moments that awaken our inner sense of well-being. We become aware that even in stressful times, peace, joy, a sense of safety are also available to us.

Dana says that glimmers have a cumulative effect. Noticing them throughout our day creates subtle shifts toward wellness in our body and mind. We become more familiar with the part of our nervous system that’s always there to nurture us and bring us ease.

What sparkling moments did you find in your day? Did something lead you to a deep belly laugh? Maybe a friend April-fooled you or you looked up after a storm and saw a rainbow.

Please tell us about them in the comments. Feel free to come back to the post any time to share your joys.

12/11/2024

Do you ever wake-up exhausted?

You feel so tired at the start of the day that you wonder how you can manage what’s in front of you.

And as you think about the difficulties in front of you, you feel your heart beating a little faster. You’re anxious and your thoughts are variations of the theme, “I don’t have what it takes. I’m not getting this right.”

Burnout symptoms include loss of self-confidence. When we’re exhausted, feeling overwhelmed, and noticing that we can’t keep our usual pace, we start to question ourselves.

I’ve seen some of the most competent and dedicate professionals wonder if they have what it takes to accomplish their goals. It’s as though all their accolades and accomplishments no longer exist.

𝘉𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳, 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘺.

We begin to see ourselves as the problem. We lose sight of our capacity to create, problem solve or change our circumstances.

Sometimes people ask me why I think it’s important to address burnout. The short answer is that burnout robs you of your connection with your purpose. And it robs the world of the impact that you and only you can make.

At same time, I’ve learned that burnout can be a catalyst for a stronger connection with our purpose. Burnout recovery reconnects us with who we are. It guides us to strategies for sustainable impact in every part of our lives.

This is what lights my fire, what sustains my commitment to burnout recovery and tackling the complexities of reducing burnout.

Join me today, Wednesday, December 11, at 11:00 AM ET for 𝘉𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘏𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘗𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘚𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. Our topic for today is, 𝘉𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘚𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘥𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘵. We’ll talk about the loss of self-confidence and self-worth that are associated with burnout and how we might find ourselves in this place. I’ll share some initial steps for easing out of self-doubt into burnout recovery.

11/20/2024

I used to teach yoga. Deepening my relationship with yoga was one of the ways that healed from burnout. One day after teaching a class, a yogi left me this handwritten message:

“𝘚𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘢…𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘢𝘨𝘦…𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴…𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶.”

I keep it on a bulletin board. It still warms my heart to read it. Feeling like a “whole package” was something that I lost when I burned out.

You may know this place. You reach the end of your day feeling exhausted, numb, disconnected, or even empty.

You’ve given so much during the day that you’re out of reserves. Yet, the next day, you drag yourself out of bed and do it all again.

For sure, this is pouring from an empty cup. And there’s another loss --- being out of touch with how life brings you meaning and how you bring meaning to life.

This loss often feels deeper, harder to recover from than physical fatigue. Yet, your connection with you is a rich energy source.

Practicing yoga was one of my tools for physical, mental, and emotional recovery. Teaching yoga brought me to moments like the one above. It sparked my memories of what really mattered to me and renewed my connection with my voice.

Join me Wednesday, November 20, at noon ET for Burnout Hiding in Plain Sight. We’ll talk about some patterns that lead to the disconnection from self often associated with burnout. We’ll explore some initial steps for reclaiming your spark.

11/13/2024

Burnout is a gradual process that can happen to anyone. Along the way, people are often doing what they can to reduce stress and exhaustion. They’re trying different strategies to manage their responsibilities and be most effective in every part of their lives.

Their loved ones may be telling them to slow down or change jobs or rest. And it’s likely that they have some moments of relief when they get a second wind. So, there are times when there’s hope that their well-being is improving.

By the time we reach a point that our performance is suffering, we are likely to wonder if things can get better. The exhaustion, strain, and self-doubt seem unrelenting. We have tried and now we feel discouraged about what’s possible for us.

Getting better seems unattainable. Truth is, you can recover from burnout. Not only do you get better, but you also have new ways of moving through life. You make changes that leave you feeling more rested, joyful, fulfilled and excited about the things that really matter to you. You have strategies that sustain your well-being.

Join me Wednesday, November 13, at noon ET for Burnout Hiding in Plain Sight. We’ll talk about some reasons burnout recovery may feel challenging. We’ll explore the recovery process and the benefits that extend well beyond our workplace.

11/11/2024

Have you heard of Peak-performance coaching? Being an “Obsessed” entrepreneur? How about Highly-Sensitive leaders?

Did that last one throw you?

Don’t worry, my friend and colleague, Harris has an answer and resources for you.

Highly-sensitive leaders see potential where others don’t. They are artists, teachers, coaches, healers, and innovators who are emotionally in tune with the world around them.

This innovative way of leading has much to offer to creative projects, organizations, and the world. Monifa created the Voicing Your Vision Summit especially for this group of leaders. Whether you’re a solopreneur or leading a team, this program can provide you with valuable strategies.

At the 4th Annual Summit, speakers will share how you can:
😍 VALUE YOUR GENIUS: Know yourself better and gain confidence in your unique qualities.
🔥CREATE YOUR VISION: Prioritize your passion and purpose.
💯AMPLIFY YOUR MESSAGE: Cultivate effective messaging to connect you to the clients that you can best serve.

Sign up for FREE at: https://tinyurl.com/yourvoiceyourvision

I’m honored to speak on November 20, Day 1, where the theme is Free Your Voice. Join Monifa and I as we explore some inner resources to elevate your voice and sustain your commitment to the impact you want to make with your work.

09/23/2024

Happy Equinox

The Sun and the Earth are doing their dance. The Equinox brings equal day and night to all of us, everywhere in the world.

Chronic stress, feeling overwhelmed, exhaustion, burnout are among the things that leave us feeling off balance. The Equinox is a perfect time to focus on what you need for equilibrium.

This time of year reminds us that everything has a complement. Dark and light. Up and down. Left and right. Fear and courage or fear and faith.

What’s on the other side of stress, overwhelm, exhaustion, or burnout for you? Calm, clarity, peace, informed energy, agency, faith, self-determination all come to mind.

Take a moment and feel into what’s on the other side for you. Then, use these questions to help you make a shift that brings you one step closer to feeling balanced.

What’s holding you in overwhelm, stress, or burnout?
What do you need to release?
What’s blossoming from efforts you made earlier in the year?
What shift can you make in an old pattern that no longer serves you?

Leave a comment to let me know what’s on the other side for you.

07/23/2024

I’m inspired when what I love aligns with the work that I do. Working with professionals on a mission to create a positive impact for others is at the top of the list of work that I love. I’m looking forward to speaking at The American College of Financial Services' 2024 Conference of African American Financial Professionals (CAAFP) in Atlanta.

The theme, Expanding Collective Impact, encourages us to focus on our professional growth as well as actions steps that we can take to benefit underserved communities and the broader society. Join me, my fellow speakers, and a community of committed professionals for three days of inspiring keynotes, thought-provoking breakout sessions, and opportunities to collaborate with colleagues to expand collective impact.

If you're joining us, please let me know in the comments. I look forward to seeing you there.

05/31/2024

What’s your favorite way to take a break?

Play breaks and naps are still at the top of my list. I keep a hula hoop near so that I can create personal playtime. After a break, I feel ready for the next priority.

Even though many of us know the benefits of taking a break, making it happen can be challenging. These are some of the reasons that I hear for working skipping the break:

• That’s how it is in my career, workplace.
• I’ll lose momentum.
• That’s lazy. I could be getting some work done.
• I’m strong enough. I can handle the pressure.
• There’s no time.

These ideas can keep us stuck in a pattern that leads to exhaustion, a core symptom of burnout. If we reach that point, we’re all out of everything and not bringing our best to the people and projects that matter to us.
Over the last year I’ve heard more discussions about proactive rest. You’ll find similar discussions in research about personal energy management.

On Monday, June 3 at noon, join me for Burnout Hiding in Plain Sight. We’ll discuss, “When Taking A Break Seems Impossible”. We’ll talk about some of the personal and professional reasons that we may find ourselves in a personal energy crisis as well as how this can impact our well-being and effectiveness. One of the things that exhaustion teaches us is the importance of recovery. We’ll review some simple strategies for shifting and creating room for rest and recovery.

Watch live at this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdRl8522HqU

05/08/2024

Do you ever listen to the same music over and over again?

Yes.

Me too. Sometimes it just gets better every time I listen.

Recently, it’s been Mary Lou’s Mass, a compilation from the legendary Mary Lou Williams. It’s my meditation and rejuvenation companion.

Today would be Mary Lou Williams’ 114th birthday. She was born and spent her early years in the Atlanta community where four generations of my family lived. So, surely our shared connection to Edgewood contributes to that inner feeling of being at home and at rest as I’m listening.

At the same time, I recognize that I’m bearing witness to her genius. We all have it. One way that it shows is in our deep relationship with our work, our craft. Mary Lou Williams had a relationship with music from the time she was a toddler. She built a legacy that spans generations. Her impact is vast. It’s social and it’s personal. You can find innumerable historical accounts of her contributions to music and humanitarianism.
And she’s holding space for me to renew my relationship with myself and my work, to reconnect with the places where my work feels like home, a place where both the work and I can grow and evolve.

This compilation is very rich. There’s jazz, gospel, spoken word, spirituals and so much more. It sparks my clarity, inspiration, and creativity every time that I listen. I’m feeling more ease, tuning in to the richness of my work, and letting my next steps unfold.

How do you cultivate and renew your relationship with your work? Let me know in the comments.

02/29/2024

Last week I had an opportunity to spend time with two legendary women who changed our world, carving out space for diversity, dignity and harmony to thrive. One of them was Jennifer Jones , first African American Radio City Music Hall Rockette. Her courage, grace, dedication, and love for dance 💃🏿shattered a decades old barrier. Witnessing the impact her story had on students, future change agents, was deeply moving. Thank you so much, Jenn ♥️🙏🏿

with .repost
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We were so fortunate to have Jennifer Jones come in last week to give a lecture presentation during common hour🦅⭐️✨

02/26/2024

Wishing you could turn off your emotions?

Life’s challenges can leave us feeling like our emotions are a rollercoaster and we just want to get off. In these moments, the inner resources that keep us thriving seem out of reach.

We may feel like:
• Work is more of a burden than a source of joy.
• An unending string of stressful moments fills our day.
• The things that once brought you fulfillment become a list of unending things to do.

So, how do we reignite our inner power source?

Join me for Love ~ A Power Source for Meaning, Impact, and Joyful Living. Love is one of those emotions that can awaken our creativity, motivate us to stay committed when times get tough, or even be a guiding life philosophy that keeps us on track toward our joy.

In this interactive workshop, you will:

✅ Discover simple strategies for making friends with your emotions.
✅ Explore love as a guide through stressful times back to a sense of safety, hope, and purpose.
✅ Enhance your emotional energy so that you have the fuel to cultivate and sustain a life that you love living.

We’ll end the evening resting into love with a brief Yoga Nidra practice. This practice offers stress relief and supports your ability to integrate the strategies that you’ll learn during the workshop.

Use this link to save your spot. http://tinyurl.com/lovepowersource

The Living Source