The Third Option International

The Third Option International The Third Option is an on-going skills based group program to build better marriages. Each of the fo Painful endurance or divorce?

Many of us manage our marriage as a series of choices between “His” desires and “Her “desires. We may choose either end of the balance line: either “Peace at any price” or “Letting it all hang out.” Why do we see only two options? Both options fail to bring us together, but instead tend to move us to extremes. Break through the clutter of past baggage and misunderstandings. Find the healthy middle ground, a program called THIRD OPTION. Third Option is an on-going skills based group program that has been building healthy marriages since 1988. Each 14 session cycle covers a comprehensive set of tools useful for developing better understanding, sensitivity and trust while learning more effective speaking and listening skills. The Third Option means reconciliation. When couples are struggling they will say they have “tried everything” but what they usually mean is they have tried the same two extreme options over and over, never finding what works. (Example: they have stuffed their anger, or they have attacked with it. Neither will give them the marriages they want.) The Third Option combines skill-building workshops and sharing from mentor couples with a peer support group that is caring and accepting.

03/16/2026

The world will not always arrange itself kindly for our children.

There will be disappointment.
Unfairness.
Moments that feel heavy and difficult to carry.

Teaching a child to notice the good in life is not about pretending those things don’t exist.

It is about helping them develop the habit of seeing the full picture.

A hard day can still hold a kind moment.
A difficult season can still contain small reasons to be grateful.
A life that is imperfect can still be deeply meaningful — in work worth doing, people worth loving, and moments of quiet contentment that would be easy to overlook.

This is where much of a good life quietly lives.
And learning to notice those things does not deny reality.
It strengthens our ability to live within it. ❤️

03/16/2026
03/16/2026

"Gentle"

03/16/2026

Naming a pattern in a relationship requires stepping back far enough to see it, which means stepping out of the most recent instance of it long enough to look at the shape of the thing.

That perspective is one of the most useful gifts you can bring to a relationship. Not as analysis. As shared understanding that both people use to build something different.

Save this for the next time you need it.

03/16/2026
03/16/2026
03/16/2026

Retrouvaille of New England: Helping Marriages since 1990 Get Help Now: Talk or Text with a Local Couple Today 508-271-7155

03/16/2026

Address

10475 Cosby Manor Road
Utica, NY
13502

Telephone

+18556249476

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Our Story

Many of us manage marriage as a series of choices between “His” desires and “Her “desires. We may choose either end of the balance line either “Peace at any price” or “Letting it all hang out.” Why do we see only two options? Painful endurance or divorce? Both options fail to bring us together, but instead tend to move us to extremes. Break through the clutter of past baggage and misunderstandings. Find the healthy middle ground, a program called THIRD OPTION. Third Option is an on-going skills based group program that has been building healthy marriages since 1988. Each 14 session cycle covers a comprehensive set of tools useful for developing better understanding, sensitivity and trust while learning more effective speaking and listening skills. The Third Option means reconciliation. When couples are struggling they will say they have “tried everything” but what they usually mean is they have tried the same two extreme options over and over, never finding what works. (Example: they have stuffed their anger, or they have attacked with it. Neither will give them the marriages they want.) The Third Option combines skill-building workshops and sharing from mentor couples with a peer support group that is caring and accepting.