Warrior Medical Associates

02/06/2026

Dr. Chris' Words:

A doctor friend put a sign on his office door: "If I cure you, I get $100, if not, you get $1000."
A lawyer figures that's easy money for him, so he comes in and says, "Doctor, I can't taste anything. Can you cure me?"
The doctor smiles and orders the nurse to bring him the medicine from drawer 33 for the lawyer to drink.
The lawyer immediately spits it out, "That's rubbing alcohol!" he screams. "Are you trying to kill me?"
"Taste cured!" said the doctor. That'll be $100 please."
Defeated, but not broken, the lawyer returns a week later. "Doctor, I can't remember anything, can you cure me?"
The doctor responded, "Nurse, please bring me the medicine in drawer 33."
"Oh no you don't," says the lawyer. That's what you gave me last time I was here and I'm not falling for it!"
"Memory cured!" said the doctor with a smile. "That'll be $100. Thank you, sir."
Incensed, the lawyer comes back a week later. "Doctor, I can't see! Can you cure me?"
"I'm so sorry," says the doctor. "I can't cure blindness. Here's your $1000 in ten $100 bills." The doctor pulls out the money and begins to count out the bills in the lawyer's hand.
"Wait a minute!" the lawyer says. "Those are $1 bills! You, sir, are a cheat!"
"Vision cured!" the doctor smiles.

Sometimes I wonder if lawyers tell doctor jokes.

02/05/2026

Dr. Chris' Words:
Coca-Colas used to contain about 3.5 mg of co***ne. That explains why our parents and grandparents could walk 8 miles to school in the rain, sleet and snow, uphill both ways.

02/05/2026

Dr. Chris' Words:

Where do fishermen go when they get seasick?

To the doc.

01/26/2026

DUE TO INCLEMENT , WEATHER OUR OFFICE WILL CLOSE ON JANUARY 26TH AND HOPE TO REOPEN , ON JANUARY 27TH.

01/13/2026

Lynn, Dr. Chris' wife: "Honey, you're awfully quiet. What are you thinking about? Rough day at work?"
Dr. Chris: "No. Nothing."
Lynn: "Oh come on, you have to be thinking about something! Are you sad? Did one of your patients pass away? Are you stressed out? Are you mad at me? Are you thinking about the kids? Are you worried about your mom and dad getting older?"... multiply that by 17,562 more questions as she tries to get him to open up and share his deepest thoughts and concerns.
Dr. Chris "OK, fine. Do you really wanna know what I'm thinking about?"
Lynn: "Yes, please. It's important that you share your heart."
Dr. Chris: "OK, I was just wondering who would win in a battle, 1000 T-800 terminators or 1 million Spartan warriors." 😂

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01/13/2026

Dr. Chris Words:
A woman at the office was irritated that her husband was acting like a big baby because of having to get a shot.
"What a wimp you are!" she said. "Men aren't the strong ones. We women have to deal with periods, pregnancy and menopause. What do you men have to deal with?"
Her husband was quick on the draw, "Periods, pregnancy and menopause!"

01/02/2026

Happy New Year! Our office is closed today and will reopen on Monday January 5th!

01/02/2026

Happy New Year
from
Warrior Medical
Associates

12/25/2025

12/23/2025

We will close on December 23rd @ 1 pm and reopen on December 29th for our Christmas Holidays.

12/19/2025

Something must be done about the violent crime and property theft rates in this country! At this rate, there are going to be a lot of prisons out of business. Crime rates haven’t been this low since the 60’s.

12/05/2025

ATTENTION!!!!
We are getting reports of companies making collection calls on our behalf. THIS IS A SCAM!!!!! Do not give them any information, please hang up and call Medisys @ 205-631-0149. They are our billers and can answer questions about your balance on your account. Please be aware we do not use a collection agency. Thank you and have a blessed day!