04/05/2026
For a long time now, I w been battling a really interesting relationship with weightlifting.
For a long time it was something I deeply enjoyed and made me feel better. It was an outlet when everything else felt big. Then it became an escape, which helped me to compartmentalize other things.
While I was finishing grad school and taking on a new role - both full-time, it became something that was easy to push off. The mental energy I was expending became heavier and more exhausting, so expending physical energy was not something I wanted to do.
Then came embarrassment, frustration, shame, anxiety and depression.
These have been emotions that have held me back from getting back in the gym. They have also made it easier for negative body talk to creep back.
Needless to say even coaches and leaders struggle. They struggle even while lifting others up.
So while everyone was at their church, I was finally back at mine.
I have no idea what this part of my journey is going to look like, but I would love to talk about it because it’s the byproduct of my day job and the political climate we’re in.
