4lifeskillz

10/25/2025

No thank you. That's what my granddaughter says when we ask her things like "do you want to go to bed?" I think she wants to soften the 'no' by being polite about it. Learning to say NO is a LIFESKILL. Some of us have trouble saying no, even if we feel like we are being used or taken advantage of. Even if we know we should. It can be uncomfortable. I say learn from baby Marah, my granddaughter. "No, thank you." Add a thank you if it makes it easier for you. Be as polite as you can. But say NO to requests that are not in your best interest or make you feel used or abused. No. No, thank you.

10/12/2025

I cook. He cleans. But I also try not to leave the kitchen a mess! Wipe as you go. Organization is a LIFESKILL.

10/12/2025

ThankbGod my husband is not the kind of guy that mindset eating the same thing a few days in a row. It allows me to cook 2 large meals on Sunday then I alternate lunch and dinners. I like glass containers for the microwave but these plastic containers from Amazon allows me to portion meals out for Monday thru Thursday and not have to spend too much time in the kitchen. Friday is our eat out say! Organization is a LIFESKILL.

08/04/2025

"All Done" is what my 2 year old granddaughter typically says after completing a meal or a task. Today, 50 minutes into her hour long swim lesson, she started whining, "I want All Done!" Her way of signaling that she had had enough. I love the boundaries that children have at recognizing their limitations. There were certainly times in my life when I pushed past my boundaries. We are taught "no pain, no gain." Or we sometimes choose to make others comfortable at the expense of our own discomfort. Is there a situation in your life that you want All done? Maybe it's a relationship, or an addiction, or bad habit, or any situation where you just no longer belong. It's time to call it! I want ALL DONE!

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07/21/2025

WHAT FEELS GOOD CAN BE EMBARRASSING

Andy Byron, former CEO of the tech firm Astronomer, resigned from his position on 19 July 2025 following a viral video incident at a Coldplay concert. The video showed him embracing Kristin Cabot, Astronomer’s Chief People Officer, in a romantic manner.

The world and especially social media is abuzz not merely because two adults were caught on camera sharing an intimate moment, but because both individuals are married to other people and work at the same company.

The footage revealed what appears to be a marital affair between a CEO and a senior employee. The pair seemed visibly embarrassed when the camera captured their actions at the concert. As a result of the video, both were asked to take leave. Andy Byron has since resigned, while Kristin Cabot has gone offline, deleting her social media profiles.

Relationships like this are not uncommon in society. The difference here is that this one was caught on camera and went viral. One might ask: why do people engage in actions they later feel ashamed of? There are important lessons to be drawn from this incident:

1. Marriage Is Not Without Challenges
Every marriage faces difficulties. When problems arise, they should be addressed either between the couple or with the help of a counsellor. If all efforts fail, it is better to part ways respectfully than to remain in the marriage and seek comfort elsewhere.

Looking for happiness outside the marriage does not solve the issues within it. It only creates more complications, just as it did for Andy Byron and Kristin Cabot. Their reputations and careers are now at risk. They face public embarrassment, emotional distress, and have caused pain to their spouses and families.

2. Marriage Requires Honour and Integrity
Marriage is for people who are committed to honesty and integrity. If you try to deceive or outsmart your spouse by being unfaithful, you will eventually be exposed. It is only a matter of time.

3. Temptation Is Inevitable, But Choices Matter
Being married does not mean you will not meet people who are more charming, attractive, or engaging than your spouse. But you must remain focused on loving your partner and nurturing your relationship.

It is a choice between what is safe and what is dangerous, between right and wrong. It is your responsibility to keep choosing what is right even when what feels good is tempting.

This incident will undoubtedly leave a scar on the dignity and emotional well-being of both Andy and Kristin. But it also serves as a cautionary tale. We all grow older, but we do not necessarily grow wiser unless we learn from our own mistakes and those of others.

In Conclusion
“Do not go stumbling into the arms of another woman. The Lord clearly sees everything you do. He watches where you go. The sins of the wicked will trap them. Those sins will be like ropes holding them back. Evil people will die because they refuse to be disciplined. They will be trapped by their own desires.” — Proverbs 5:20–23 (ERV).

Frank Edem Adofoli (Counselor Adofoli)
Counsellor, ADR Practitioner, Conference Speaker & Author.
CEO, The Marriage Consult LTD.
T. +233201435300.

07/20/2025

Affairs are just fantasy. Another form of numbing, like drug use. Until reality hits.

06/24/2025

Don’t be a gentleman to other people’s women, while being a monster to yours.

06/21/2025

Life skill.