July 29th, 2012, I went for my first mammogram. They asked me how long I had a dimple on my breast. I never noticed it. They sent me for an ultrasound and said I’d be hearing from my doctor. I was sent for a biopsy and on July 24th I found out that I had breast cancer. The first thing that popped in my head is that I was going to live because God is going to use my journey to help others. My first concern was my mental health. I had PTSD by the age of 10 with many more traumas throughout the years and I never dealt with any of that, which was a slow death for me. I believe my life would have been a little easier if I took care of my mental health the right way. I was young and it’s something I didn’t want to admit to and tried dealing with the trauma in my own way but at 35 I realized that what I was doing wasn’t working. I started therapy and cried at every appointment for at least 4yrs and at that point I promised myself that I would deal with any other traumas that I may experience in life. So, now I have cancer and how can this not be a traumatic experience. I went through chemo, radiation and many surgeries and on Dec. 18th, 2013, was told that I was cancer free. This is when the mental effects of cancer hit me. It’s not because nothing happened during my journey because we all still have spouses, kids, jobs, school, bills etc. that we must deal with on top of worrying if the chemo or surgery is going to work. I was focused on the physical and all the bad things that happened during my journey I put in a little compartment in my head and promised myself that I would deal with all those things I stuffed in there. We are left with a "New normal" physically and mentally after a journey like this. I realized that there were a lot of things that I couldn’t change, a lot of things that were going to take time to heal from, but I could do something with my physical appearance. I lost all my hair, and it grew back. I gained 30lbs on chemo and lost weight. I had both breasts removed and had reconstruction, so I now have 2 lumps that fill a shirt. The only thing that I couldn’t do anything about was all my scars. In 2013 I seen on FB how people were tattooing the full breast and not just ar**la and ni**le. I decided that was what I was going to do but it was going to cost me $500 which I didn’t have. My friend Emily had a surprise fundraiser for me and I got enough to get my first tattoo. I got my left breast covered and I remember seeing it for the first time and was so excited because I didn’t have a chest full of scars anymore, I have a blank canvas that I could put what I wanted on it. The last piece of reconstruction
I told the guy that day that I need to do something because money shouldn’t hinder women from receiving this blessing. and healing. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing but God always put the right people in my path to help us get where we are today. We cover scars with tattoos and it’s free. We work with women throughout all New England. The only state we haven’t worked with yet is Maine. We also give out comfort bags to ladies who are going through chemo or recovering from surgery. We give gift bags to every survivor we meet. We adopt a survivor and their family for Christmas
We have donated to ladies wanting to do the things on their bucket list. We donated to Gloria Gemma so ladies could walk with the flame. We have wigs that they can get for free. We have an amazing hair stylist, Renee Lee, who will show them how to maintain it and style it. All money raised goes back to the women in some way. I want to thank all those who have sponsored, donated time and talent, donated money or products, volunteered and who have come to my events. If it wasn’t for you, I would not be here 10yrs later. I’m truly grateful. I’m just the middleman. I can’t do this without you. Thank you for helping me help others.
