Sharmilah Adams-Israel Therapeutic Services

30/11/2025

30/11/2025

SAI Sharmilah Adams-Israel Therapeutic Services will be closing on 23rd December and RE-OPEN on 6 January.

Wishing you a safe holiday💕

For appointments please book in advance.
Contact 082 711 2259.

17/11/2025

Once again my couples I see in my private practise at Crawford Wellness Centre have requested navigating a conversation around finance.

I will try providing simple steps to engage in this topic that many times causes friction and arguments.

To not overwhelm couples, I shall break it down into parts.

Part 1:

Navigating the Finance Talk in Marriage

1. Pick the right moment
It is important to pick the right time and not when either are stressed, you've had a bad day or feel resentment towards the other for a bill that is overdue. Timing is important.

Schedule a short “finance date” (15‑30 min) once a week or month—treat it like any other appointment.

2. Start with positive framing
Simple dialogues are indicated below.
- “I love how we’re both trying to reach our goals together.”
- Avoid blame (“You always…”) and focus on the team mindset. When one blames, the conversation takes another direction.

3. Share numbers first
It is important to show honesty as there might have been financial infidelity in the past.
- Each partner shares income, debts, and regular expenses without judgment.
- Transparency builds trust; hidden numbers breed suspicion.

If at any moment, the conversation gets heated, back down and speak when there is calmness as we know that arguments can go from zero to a hundred causing anger, resentment and frustration and not wanting to broach the subject again.

Bottom line and some ground rules are:
- Plan the talk,
- Share openly,
- Agree on rules,
- Stay flexible,
- Keep the tone collaborative.

When you treat money as a joint project, the conversation stays constructive and even empowering. 💰❤️

I am available for consultation to broach this subject. For appointments, call 0827112259.

16/09/2025

Please contact 082 711 2259 for all appointments.

08/09/2025

SAI Therapy contact details has changed. For appointments, please contact cell: 082 711 2259.

Look forward to hearing from you.

25/08/2025

Honouring some of the Women in my life- mothers, sisters, daughter, cousins, friends, nieces, Associates Crawford Wellness Centre , work colleagues, business women, humanitarian activists.

Each has played a role in my life.
I honour you!

15/06/2025

Celebrating my 3rd year on Facebook. Thank you for your continuing support. I could never have made it without you. 🙏🤗🎉

15/06/2025

Reflections of the week:

This has been a tough week Algamdulillah. And I thought to pen these thoughts here as therapists also have tough days, we are human after all. I hope that my reflections will give another HOPE and know that Allah always gets you through, perhaps not in the way that you had planned but always in His Plan- the best plan.
We take these life's challenges as a test from Our Rabb.

In the midst of life's challenges, remember that Allah is always in control. The struggles, the sacrifices, and the pain – He sees it all. When the tests of life feel endless, turn to your Creator for strength. Take it one step at a time, and trust that with patience and faith, the doors will open, and the weight will lift.

Life's challenges may seem endless, but remember Allah's control and wisdom. He knows your struggles, sacrifices, and pain. In difficult times, turn to Him for strength. Take things one day at a time, and trust that His plan unfolds perfectly.

If you struggling seeing the plan of Allah, if you need to get your spirituality to another level, make an appointment with me 💐

02/06/2025

19/05/2025

Having dealt with couples and relationships for over 20 years, there are usually themes that will run through the marriage or patterns.

And there are several factors that lead to the breakdown of the marriage.

Listed are some key aspects and common causes:
1. Communication breakdown: Lack of effective communication, misunderstandings, and unresolved conflicts.
2. Lack of trust: Betrayal, dishonesty, or mistrust can erode the foundation of a marriage.
3. Financial stress: Financial difficulties, disagreements on financial management, or unmet financial expectations.
4. Incompatibility: Differences in parenting skills, values, goals, or lifestyle that become insurmountable.
5. In laws or different family dynamics: Interference from family or others: Excessive interference from family members, friends, or others can strain a marriage.
And then the small things over time that lead to bigger things and resentment to the other spouse.

In Islam, couples are encouraged to seek solutions through:

1. Counselling: Consult with a trusted counsellor or Islamic scholar.
2. Practice self-reflection: Identify areas for personal improvement, accountability and taking responsibility is important for the marriage to heal.
3. Foster forgiveness: Work towards forgiveness and reconciliation.

Important is to note that Allah says that if there is no way out and the damage is way too much, then let the couple part in peace.

I am available for consultation Mondays to Saturdays. Please contact 082 456 2125 for an appointment.

18/05/2025

All marriages has its challenges, and when a couple decides to reconcile, its about not pointing the fingers to the other one but REALLY taking ACCOUNTABILITY as to why the marriage ended up in that state to begin with.

Rreconciliation isn't about winning, it's not about a tit-for-tat situation but about reconnecting.

In a marriage, reconciliation is about more than just putting the past behind you; that is easier said than done but - it's about mutual accountability, understanding, and the willingness to mend what was broken. When TRUE ACCOUNTABILITY does not take place, and EACH spouse looking at their OWN character defects, the probability that the marriage could end up being toxic and destructive again are high.

Healing necessitates that both partners take responsibility for their own actions, listen to each other without defensiveness, and work sincerely to rebuild trust. There are aspects that can trigger a spouse - its about learning what these triggers are and seeing how to do things differently.

When I work with my couples in my private practise, and a spouse becomes defensive, or throws their toys out of the cot - it does not validate the pain that the other one endured.

Reconciliation is possible but both needs to put the work in.

I am available for consultation from Monday to Saturday at Crawford Wellness Centre. For appointments, please contact 082 456 2125.