My point of view, through life experiences".

13/02/2021

Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Forgiving is a process.

Forgiveness start with oneself.
Let us start today with this process of forgiving.
Day 1 : forgive yourself for all the bad decisions you made in life.

15/02/2017

20/01/2017

Sometimes in life we make things to be difficult or more complicated then they are , Today with my friends we were discussing an issue of meeting someone new , or marrying someone who is not father to your kids.
There where few concerns from my friends
1. What if he doesn't love my kids
2. What if they don't love him
3. Will he be able or must he be allowed to discipline the kids.
4. Should he support them financially?
5. Must we all live as a big family or you must leave them at home with grandmother.
6. What to do if he makes you choose between him and your kids.
My view to above is, firstly I don't expect him to love my kids , and I don't expect them to love him because I don't believe in forced love , but I I believe in both respecting each other, my children respecting that I he is my choice , a valuable relationship will be built between them.
With an issue of discipline , it all depends on how much involved is he , with the children . The more involved you are , the easier it becomes to discipline . With me an involved somebody will be given a right to discipline .
Financial assistance , it's a difficult one to answer , all I can say it lies with him , it's his money anyway but a man who loves me will never let me struggle if he has means of helping out.
A man who wants me to choose between him and my kids ? He is playing with fire , the love for my kids is not the same as the love for him . So he will never win , I will never chose a man over my kids , no matter how much i love him . I believe motherly love is much stronger than any other forces out there so he must never make me choose because he will never win.

What is your view on this?

21/08/2016

It doesn't mean just because you were hurt now you'll never be hurt tomorrow. The pain you feel today will never immunize you for the pain you'll feel tomorrow. You can not say because I was hurt yesterday I wont be hurt tomorrow.
The most important thing in life is how you handle hurt.
I always say it's ok to be hurt and it's ok to feel pain but you have to learn in that hurt and pain you experiencing at that particular time.
Never let it hurt you again.
Ladies if your men leaves you,it does not mean that the new man you have won't leave you.
Gentlemen vise versa
If your house is burnt down, it does not mean the new one ,that you are going to build will not burn down . The difference is that the new one will be more fire proofed, so the damage will be little.
That is life.

20/08/2016

Sometimes having nothing makes you value things other people perceive valueless. I have nothing but I still have me. Having me is the best thing I have ever had. What more could I ask for. Thank you god for this wonderful gift of life you gave me.

16/07/2016

9 yrs of not using public transport . It's a long time. Due to personal reason I decided to sell my car ,excluding being broke as a reason .
I told my self I would not buy a car for another year that means I have a year of using public transport.
I had fear of delays, not getting transport in time ,rude taxi drivers , rude passangers etc.
if I'm not mistaken i have 2 to 3 months using public transport/ transport that's not mine.
Going back to public transport have reminded me how kind people are.
It also reminded me that I must respect people around me.
I have ridded twice in a taxi for free , just because these taxi drivers know me from where I work , but I could not recognize them.
I have paid money that was shot to the other one , that was act of kindness.
I have never spent even 30 minutes waiting on the road just because people are kind to give us lift.
Sometimes it takes to have nothing to see the kindness in others.
If I have never taken that decision to not have a car I wouldn't Have valued the kindness I have received.

07/07/2016

I am a traditionalist I don't expect my man to cook , do laundry and whatever perceived as women's chores.
But I do expect my man to take care of me as a wife , that means supporting me financially , take care of my needs.
Since I'm a working woman , I'm not always at home , he has to accept whatever food I give him , even if it's a sandwich, because if I'm tired I won't cook. He must wear whatever available to wear because if I'm tired I won't do laundry.
If the house is not clean he must understand we were both at work no one cleaned the house.
If he cannot cope with the above he is welcomed to assist with house chores because I'm a kind of woman who won't overwork herself to please someone else.

20/06/2016

There is a phrase that people like to say(I was the best thing that ever happened to you)
1. If you were the best thing that ever happened to me , why are we using past tense? Where are you.
2. The fact that we are not together
It means I found the best. If it wasn't the best I was gonna comeback begging for forgiveness. So you were not the best.
3.The fact that you don't know what my best is , means you were never my best.
4. My standards of my best will never be your standard of best.
5. My best is not monetary or either materialistic .
6. My best is not judged by ballooned ego neither by your social circle.

I have my best and my best was not you.

20/06/2016

There are days that I have a lot to write about. There are days that I don't wanna write about anything.
Today I'm reminded of my father who passed away some years ago.
Not having much to say about him makes me feel guilty.
When everyone is bragging about how wonderful their fathers are , I just can't remember how wonderful he was.
I don't even have days where I feel like I miss him.
I wish I can have that feeling of loving and missing my dad.
I prayed for it but it never happened.
No matter how I'm feeling and what never happened but you are my father.
Even today I'm still praying for that feeling of loving my dad even if he is not here.

13/06/2016

We had problem for 2weeks. As from tomorrow the page will be fully functioning.

17/05/2016

The power of letting go.
As I was sorting out my closet today I came across a lot of items I ve never worn for ages.
In years I have gained and lost weight but I never gave away clothes that don't fit anymore.
The thing is I've attached monetary value on them.
today I told my self if it doesn't fit it's not supposed to be in my closet. I gave away most of my items. I was left with a clean environment and more space for knew items.
If something doesn't add value to your life, it's not suppose to be in your life.
I'm talking about relationships,friendships, jobs, anything you can think of.
It doesn't matter how much you'll lose in the process but you'll regain your happiness,your pride.
You'll be opening up your heart to more lov and more valuable things.
My friends asked if I'm crazy giving away so much. I told them I'm not, I'm doing something I should have done long time ago. To give limitless and to receive endlessly.
Letting go is a difficult but healing process.
Even if you have to leave that mension and rent umkhukhu.
Even if you have to part with that Mercedes benz it's ok.
Starting a new life may sound scary but it's the most fulfilling moment to know I started afresh.
Never, never and never be afraid to let go.