08/06/2018
CHAM CHILOMBO'S DIARY
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THE INNER VOW
I remember being in love with this little girl in my 3rd grade class and writing her a letter. Unfortunately in the process of passing it on to some friends so that it gets to her, the teacher found it. He read it to the entire class, they all laughed.
I said to myself "Never again will anyone see me like that" This vow started the links in the chain across my heart.
I decided to forget about this experience, then my older sister and her friends found out about it. They laughed.
In my heart I put another chain that blocked the entry of love.
My friends never seemed to forget about this, they would catch me gazing at this little girl and would say "Ha, look! his in love" then they would laugh it off.
I would say to myself, never again will anyone ever see me like this.
I was young, I was only 7 or 8 by then, but little did I know the words I would utter were closing up places in my heart that I was supposed to express love before family, friends and also with God.
By making those vows I had committed to never be vulnerable again before anyone or expressing how I feel for my friends and family. Worse off it affected how I express my love before God.
I would hardly pour out my heart before God for fear of being ridiculed, laughed at or rejected. The inner vows I had made as a little boy had locked my heart away from intimacy.
Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man will open the door I will come in and have fellowship with him.” -Revelation 3:20.
"If any man would open"
The handle is on my side and I had to allow the fire of God's love to break every chain from any vow I made, and he did.
Inner vows are words you utter after a negative experience , words usually in the negative (in this context)
So many of us have been so chained in this area by past experiences that the gateway of first love in our lives is chained and shut and therefore, we are unable to have the communion with the Father in a place of intimacy.
You may wonder why it's hard to express yourself freely before God or before people, it may be an inner vow you made.
If you are in a relationship, you ought to be watchful of inner vows you made from your previous relationship. They can affect the current one.
Are you willing to allow the fire of God's love to break every chain made from words you uttered?
Allow him..
