Fiona Rogerson - Trauma and Perinatal Counsellor & Birth Educator, Perth

Fiona Rogerson - Trauma and Perinatal Counsellor & Birth Educator, Perth Specialist counselling and EMDR for birth trauma, perinatal trauma, PTSD & cPTSD. Perth + Aus-wide.

Self-gaslighting is what happens when you begin to doubt your own experience, when you minimise your pain, justify what ...
16/03/2026

Self-gaslighting is what happens when you begin to doubt your own experience, when you minimise your pain, justify what happened, or convince yourself that you’re “overreacting.”

After birth trauma, it might sound like this:

“It wasn’t that bad.”
“Others have had it worse.”
“I should be grateful.”
“The staff were just doing their job.”
“Maybe it’s just me.”

These thoughts can creep in quietly. They often show up as your mind trying to make sense of something overwhelming. If you can explain it away, minimise it, or compare it to something worse, then maybe you don’t have to feel how painful it actually was.

But what it often does instead is silence your own experience.

Many women I work with spent months, sometimes years, convincing themselves that what happened during their birth “shouldn’t” affect them this much. They try to be the reasonable one. The grateful one. The one who moves on.

And yet the body keeps remembering. The thoughts come back at night. The anger or sadness appears in unexpected moments. Parenting feels heavier than they imagined it would.

You don’t need to justify what happened to you.
You don’t need to compare your story to anyone else’s.

Your experience matters because it happened to you.

Healing often begins in a very simple place, when you stop arguing with the part of you that says something about that wasn’t okay.

If you’re ready to start making sense of what happened and begin working through it, send me a DM and we can find a time that suits.

If you’ve ever had even one of these thoughts and wondered what’s wrong with me, this is for you 👇🏽Comment PARENTING bel...
10/03/2026

If you’ve ever had even one of these thoughts and wondered what’s wrong with me, this is for you 👇🏽

Comment PARENTING below and I’ll send you my guide
7 Signs Your Birth Trauma Is Impacting Your Parenting.

When your child cries, does your body go straight to alarm?Your heart races. Your chest tightens. Your thoughts start sc...
09/03/2026

When your child cries, does your body go straight to alarm?

Your heart races. Your chest tightens. Your thoughts start scanning for what’s wrong. Everything in you mobilises to stop the sound as quickly as possible.

Many mothers assume this means they’re not coping well enough. That they need better parenting strategies, more patience, or stronger regulation. But often what’s happening has very little to do with parenting ability.
It’s your nervous system remembering.

For many women who experienced birth trauma, labour was the first moment their body felt completely out of control. Pain escalating, people moving quickly around you, decisions happening that you didn’t feel part of, a sense that something might be going wrong.

In those moments your nervous system shifted into survival mode because it had to.

The difficulty is that when the baby arrives safely, the nervous system doesn’t always register that the danger has passed. The protective response can stay active long after the birth itself is over.

So when your baby cries now, your brain isn’t just hearing a sound. Your nervous system is detecting threat. Your body responds before logic has a chance to step in.

From the outside it can look like anxiety. From the inside it feels like pure fear.
Most parenting advice assumes the problem is behavioural. Regulate. Respond differently.
But when the nervous system is still operating from protection, regulation won't even scratch the surface of what's really going on.

This is where trauma therapies like EMDR can help. They work directly with the nervous system to process the moments where your body first learned that loss of control and danger. As those experiences are processed, that response begins to settle. Your child's cry gradually becomes what it was always meant to be, information about a need rather than a signal that something terrible might happen.

If parts of this feel familiar, comment PARENTING below and I’ll send you my free guide '7 Signs Your Birth Trauma Is Impacting Your Parenting'.
It explains the ways birth trauma can quietly show up in everyday parenting moments, and what actually helps the nervous system begin to feel safe again.

You did not fail your birth.Most mum who’ve experienced a traumatic birth, somewhere along the way, decide that they did...
26/02/2026

You did not fail your birth.

Most mum who’ve experienced a traumatic birth, somewhere along the way, decide that they did.

Maybe the birth did not go to plan. Maybe you froze. Maybe you agreed to something you swore you would never agree to. Maybe you didn’t speak up. Maybe you still replay the moment where everything changed and think, that was it, that was where I failed.

When birth becomes overwhelming, frightening or medically urgent, your nervous system shifts into survival. It doesn’t prioritise your plan or your preferences. It does not measure how articulate or assertive you are being. It scans for safety. It narrows your focus. It pulls you into whatever response it believes will get you and your baby through.

Freeze is not failure. Compliance is not failure. Going quiet is not failure. These are wired survival responses. Afterwards, when you are safe and your thinking brain is fully back online, it can look back at those moments and judge them harshly. It tells a neat story… I failed… I should have done more.

But trauma often involves the loss of control. Not the absence of strength. Not the absence of love. Not a flaw in you as a mother.

Many women carry the belief that they failed their birth. That they did not advocate enough. That they let themselves or their baby down. These beliefs grow from shock and helplessness. They are attempts to make sense of something that felt terrifying or chaotic.

Sometimes what needs attention is not your perceived failure, but the trauma your body is still holding from that room.

If this is you, if the words ‘I failed’ still sit heavily in your heart, DM me and we can gently begin to untangle it together.

Why does the sound of my baby crying feel like a siren going off in my body?You are not scared of your baby.You are scar...
24/02/2026

Why does the sound of my baby crying feel like a siren going off in my body?

You are not scared of your baby.
You are scared of what happens inside you when they cry.

That panic.
That heat.
That trapped feeling.
That split second where you want it to run, and then hate yourself for your inability to cope.

No one prepares you for the fact that love and activation can coexist.
You can adore your baby and still feel your nervous system fire like you are under threat. And when that happens, most parents do not reach for compassion. They reach for self judgement.

They tell themselves to be better. Calmer. More patient. More grateful.
But a triggered nervous system is not a parenting failure, it's a trauma response.

Which is why I created a free guide, '7 Signs Your Birth Trauma Is Impacting Your Parenting'.

Not to pathologise you.
Not to label you.
But to help you recognise patterns that make sense in context.
Because once you can see the pattern, you stop turning it into a verdict about who you are.

Comment the word PARENTING below and I'll send it to you.

On the hard days, remind yourself...That replaying it doesn’t mean you’re stuck, it means something in you is still tryi...
23/02/2026

On the hard days, remind yourself...

That replaying it doesn’t mean you’re stuck, it means something in you is still trying to make sense of it.

That just because it’s in the past doesn’t mean your body feels finished with it.

That loving your baby and grieving your birth can exist in the same breath.

That other people being “over it” doesn’t mean you should be.

That feeling triggered by hospitals, check-ups, or even pregnancy announcements isn’t dramatic or selfish, it’s protective.

On the hard days, the shame can get LOUD. The self-blame can creep in. The “I should be fine by now” thoughts can feel convincing.

That’s when you come back to this:
What happened to you matters.
Your nervous system responded the way nervous systems do when something feels overwhelming or unsafe.
And healing rarely moves in a straight line.

If today is a hard day, save this post and keep coming back to it. Let the reminder be louder than the self-criticism.

💛

You might not agree, but these are my thoughts...Most parenting advice is built on one quiet assumption that a mothers b...
12/02/2026

You might not agree, but these are my thoughts...

Most parenting advice is built on one quiet assumption that a mothers body feels basically safe most of the time.

Safe to pause.
Safe to reflect.
Safe to choose a response instead of reacting.

BUT trauma changes how the nervous system reads the world.

If your body has learnt through birth, childhood, relationships, or medical experiences that you did not get a say, that your boundaries were not respected, or that you had to override yourself to get through something hard, parenting is not neutral. It can feel like pressure. Exposure. Loss of control. Urgency without escape.

And parenting is FULL of moments that mirror those exact sensations.
Noise. Touch. Demand. Unpredictability. Being needed when you have nothing left to give.

So when advice says, “Just stay calm.”
Or, “Just regulate first.”
Or, “Just take a breath.”
It can land like failure when your body is already in survival mode.
Because you CANNOT access calm when your nervous system is trying to keep you safe.
You cannot logic your way out of a trauma response.
And you cannot strategy your way into safety.

This is why traumatised parents often feel like parenting advice works for everyone else but not for them.

If this you right not, it's not because you're trying less. You're not doing it wrong.
It is because the advice is skipping the most important step, helping the body feel safe enough to choose differently.

When safety comes back online, parenting strategies suddenly make more sense.
Your nervous system is no longer fighting to protect you.

If you have ever felt like parenting advice works in theory but falls apart in real life, there is usually a reason.

My free guide, 7 Signs Birth Trauma Is Impacting Your Parenting, helps you quickly spot patterns you might not have linked back to birth or earlier experiences, so you can start joining the dots for yourself.

Comment PARENTING below and I will send it to you.

Not all trauma responses look like fear or collapse. Many look like coping too well.One of the hardest parts of postnata...
01/02/2026

Not all trauma responses look like fear or collapse. Many look like coping too well.

One of the hardest parts of postnatal trauma is how invisible it can become, even to the person living it. You might be functioning, ticking boxes, getting on with things. But underneath, your nervous system is stuck in survival mode, doing whatever it takes to avoid feeling that level of helplessness again.

That’s why so many mums come into counselling unsure if what they went through even “counts” as trauma. They’re not having flashbacks. They’re not falling apart. But they’re chronically tense, detached, overwhelmed by small disruptions, or panicked when things feel out of control.

These are adaptations.

And they make complete sense. It’s common for trauma to show up through the body, through parenting patterns, through habits that once helped you cope, but are now making daily life feel harder.

Understanding these responses for what they are is often the first step in moving forward. They're not weakness. Not personality flaws. Not overreacting. Just a nervous system trying to stay safe, after facing previous threat... even if the danger has passed.

If any of these responses feel familiar, you’re not broken. You’re responding in ways that once made perfect sense.

Ready to take the next step in moving forward? Head to the link in my bio to book your session.

Loneliness in motherhood isn’t always about being alone. It’s about feeling unseen.You can have people around you, a par...
29/01/2026

Loneliness in motherhood isn’t always about being alone. It’s about feeling unseen.

You can have people around you, a partner in the house, even a baby in your arms, and still feel profoundly disconnected.

Because what so many mothers we support are starved of after a traumatic birth isn’t company. It’s attunement.

That feeling of being noticed. Considered. Emotionally responded to.

And in the absence of that, it’s just easier to turn inward and start to question yourself. Especially when you’re watching other mums, online or in real life, who seem to be coping better, bonding faster, smiling more. Comparison quickly becomes self-judgement. “What’s wrong with me?” becomes the question that plays on repeat. And the isolation deepens.

Often, the groundwork for that loneliness is laid during birth itself... When your needs were minimised. When your preferences were overruled. When you were treated like a body, not a person. Those experiences send a clear message that your needs are secondary, and that your voice doesn’t matter.

So you begin parenting from that place. Doubting what you feel. Hiding what you need. Holding in the tears because “at least the baby is okay.”

And the world affirms it. The expectations of early motherhood are built around sacrifice and silence. Around performing strength, even when you’re running on empty.

This is the kind of loneliness that cuts deep, not because you're physically alone, but because so many parts of your experience have gone unseen, invalidated or pushed aside.

Did you feel that too?

If it resonates, drop a ❤️ in the comments below.

Out of ideas of how to save your relationship?Most couples aren’t failing. They’re just unsupported in the hardest trans...
28/01/2026

Out of ideas of how to save your relationship?

Most couples aren’t failing. They’re just unsupported in the hardest transition of their lives.

Because nothing quite prepares you for how parenthood changes the ground beneath your relationship. The pressure, the resentment, the constant background noise of exhaustion... it all adds up. And slowly, the version of “us” you knew becomes harder to recognise.

This is about how much load your relationship has had to carry without enough room to process any of it, not about how much you love each other.

You might be interpreting the distance as disconnection, when really it’s depletion. You might be assuming the arguments mean something is broken, when really, they’re a signal that something deeper needs tending.

So often in trauma work, I see that conflict isn’t always a sign of rupture. Sometimes it’s a scrambled attempt at reconnection, through frustration, protest, or sheer survival mode. The goal isn’t to fix the relationship in one conversation. It’s to slow the cycle down enough that both people can come back into view again.

If you’re at the point where it feels like nothing is working, that might be the clearest sign that support isn’t just helpful, it’s necessary.

Details are in the link in my bio.

Another hard truth?Time alone doesn’t resolve trauma.Neither does gratitude.Neither does “getting on with it.”Birth trau...
22/01/2026

Another hard truth?
Time alone doesn’t resolve trauma.
Neither does gratitude.
Neither does “getting on with it.”

Birth trauma often shows up after the birth, once the body has space to register what it went through.

That’s why the nights feel harder.
Why unpredictability feels intolerable.
Why closeness can feel threatening.
Why you can want space and connection at the same time.
Why your reactions don’t match how much you love your baby.

Another uncomfortable truth is that many women are given coping tools for something that actually needs processing.

You’re taught how to manage the symptoms, not resolve the cause.

And here’s the truth no one says clearly enough.
These responses make sense.
They’re logical outcomes of a nervous system that lost safety and control.
They’re not personality traits.
They’re not parenting styles.
And they’re not something you just have to live with.

The hardest truth of all is this.
If trauma isn’t addressed, it doesn’t disappear.
It simply changes shape.

But none of this has to continue.

Specialist perinatal trauma support isn’t about reliving your birth or forcing yourself to talk it through. It’s about helping your body process what it couldn’t at the time, so it no longer has to stay on high alert.

If you recognised yourself here, this doesn’t have to be your normal.

Head to the link my bio, book in a session, and we can help you find your light again.

If you work in maternity care, please keep reading…
Most clinicians are familiar with the idea of being trauma-informed....
21/01/2026

If you work in maternity care, please keep reading…

Most clinicians are familiar with the idea of being trauma-informed. Far fewer have been supported to practise trauma-responsive care, particularly in the hours and days after birth.

From a nervous system perspective, the post-birth period is not neutral. Physiologically and neurologically, the body often remains in a heightened state. Memory is still consolidating. Meaning is still being assigned. Safety is still being assessed.

This is why timing matters as much as intention.

When fear or near-miss language is introduced after birth, even retrospectively, it can be encoded as ongoing threat rather than resolved risk. The nervous system does not register that the danger has passed. Instead, it learns that something terrible almost happened and may still need monitoring.

Over time, this can show up as hypervigilance, intrusive replay, difficulty trusting the body, fear in future pregnancies, or a persistent sense that birth is unsafe, even when clinical outcomes were stable.

Trauma-responsive care invites a different way of thinking.

Instead of asking, “Was I being honest?”
It asks, “Who is this information for right now?”

Instead of asking, “The birth is over, so can I say this?”
It asks, “Has her nervous system had time to find safety?”

Instead of asking, “I need to process this.”
It asks, “Where is the safest place for that processing to happen?”

This shift, from intention to timing, is central to trauma-responsive care. It recognises that the immediate post-birth period is a critical window for containment, not clinician processing.

This is one of the core frameworks we explore in Rethinking Trauma, moving beyond awareness into practical, nervous-system-responsive care.

Rethinking Trauma 2026 dates are now open, with the first training running in March. I would genuinely love to have you there. This is where we move beyond good intentions and start making real change.

Because reducing birth trauma is not only about what happens during birth.
It is also about how the experience is held afterwards.

Head to the link in my bio to join.

Address

6/640 Beeliar Drive, Success
Perth, WA
6164

Opening Hours

Monday 8:30am - 5pm
Tuesday 8:30am - 5pm
Wednesday 9am - 5pm
Thursday 9am - 5pm
Friday 9am - 5pm

Telephone

+61402017425

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Fiona Rogerson - Trauma and Perinatal Counsellor & Birth Educator, Perth posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Featured

Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on LinkedIn
Share on Pinterest Share on Reddit Share via Email
Share on WhatsApp Share on Instagram Share on Telegram

Category

Who is Fiona Rogerson?

Thank you for being here. My work has developed from a culmination of my own personal experiences of birth and motherhood (which included secondary infertility, IVF, pregnancy loss, instrumental birth, postnatal depression and breastfeeding struggles, but ultimately beautiful positive birth) together with what I witnessed to be similar experiences of other mothers through my initial work as a professional pregnancy and birth photographer which first began in 2009, together with my work as a birth/postnatal doula and antenatal educator. What I found to be a crucial but missing element for the parents I worked with, and for myself as well, was genuine, professional support that could help them navigate perhaps the most intense phase of their life... their perinatal period.

Through my counselling I provide a safe, supportive space for mothers and fathers to feel validated and fully heard, unravel and identify confusing and troubling thoughts and emotions, find clarity among their feelings, and discover strategies and tools to move forward toward achieving fulfillment and happiness. I provide confidential support in all areas of perinatal difficulties for women and men, including birth trauma and debriefing, pre and postnatal anxiety, low-self-esteem, loss of identity, fertility, unplanned pregnancy, and grief and loss.

Dare to walk a different path. I will light your way.