08/08/2025
Five years ago, I started over.
A U-Haul. Two kids. My first solo mortgage.
A new town in the middle of a pandemic.
No blueprint, no perfect plan — just a quiet voice inside that said:
“You’ll figure it out… you always have.”
And I did.
I rebuilt a life from the ground up.
Not perfectly, but fully.
I showed up for my kids. For my clients. For the people who count on me.
Even when I wasn’t sure how I’d make it through the day.
There’s a version of my life I used to picture —
A marriage, a family, a forever home.
I grieve that version more than I say out loud.
But I’m also proud of the one I’ve created on my own time.
The partnership part? That’s the part I’m still trying to understand.
My marriage left marks I didn’t know were there.
I’ve learned I need space. I like time to myself — I actually need it.
And when life pulls you in so many directions,
it’s hard to meet someone else’s needs while trying to meet your own.
I’m not hiding the relationship I’m in.
I’m just not rushing to label something I don’t fully understand yet.
There were so many things I once thought were right — and they weren’t.
I’m being more careful now. Slower.
Not to protect the image — but to protect my peace.
What I wasn’t prepared for though — was when someone new entered their lives.
Not because I don’t want their dad to be happy — I really do.
But seeing another woman in the mix of the daily parenting moments…
has hurt in ways I didn’t see coming.
It’s not about jealousy.
It’s about the tenderness of being a mom.
The identity shift. The ache of feeling replaced — even if unintentionally.
And honestly, the grief of what I miss when I’m not with them.
My boundaries have been misread at times.
The hardest part is not always knowing how to share my side.
Not to defend — just to be understood.
When only one perspective is heard, the rest can disappear into silence.
So here I am —
Still healing.
Still raising two incredible kids.
Still building something solid from something that cracked.
Still showing up, even when I’d rather hide.
Still figuring it out…
Because I always have.
For anyone who’s had to rebuild: this one’s for you.
Drop a 🧡 if you feel this.
