Ottawa Counselling & Mediation Services

04/12/2024

THE CREATION AND BIRTHING OF COMMUNITY

A good example of the creation and birthing of a community is Inglenook Community High School in Toronto, which is now celebrating its 50th year of community building and modelling. It is an art form and a very sensitive procedure to initially “spark plug” a good idea from the seedling stage. If the idea is to germinate and grow successfully, it must be carefully nurtured. By highlighting the start-up principles that were focused on at Inglenook CHS in 1974, this article identifies some of the necessary ingredients for the success of a sustainable and durable community of any type.

One of the biggest challenges for building strong communities is the prevalence of huge, organized forces that thwart creativity and diversity. One of the greatest components of smaller cohesive communities is that they can and do challenge on-going dominant paradigms. In communities like Inglenook, there is a balance of interests that are democratically collaborated on by administrators, teachers, students and parents.
This creates a strong feeling of inclusion and social connection.
This cohesiveness leads to a history of meaningful associations and a legacy of participants feeling part of a vibrant community.

At Inglenook we instituted several principles that can be adapted to suit any fledging community group that hopes to become a stable and embedded part of their local environment.
The following is a list of some of those principles used successfully at Inglenook:

…Size is crucial. At Inglenook the student/teacher ratio was 7/1.
…Unique programs/concepts. At Inglenook we instituted outreach and “shadowing” whereby each student would go out into the city and follow around workers in many different roles.
…A unique setting. Architecturally an inglenook is a safe, comfortable and warm space where emotional growth and learning can be maximized.
…Cost cutting. Maximizing use of community resources.
At Inglenook parents and students built room partitions with moveable 8X4 foot panels. Allowing flexible classroom designs.
…Real time management. Do the subject homework just after it is assigned. Finish the Ministry of Educations curricula before April and then be creative with subjects for the rest of the year.
…Linking more resourceful students with less resourceful students. Fostering emotional support between students.
…Recognizing leadership potential. Giving leaders significant roles so that they know that they are appreciated.
…Respect for authority while challenging authority. Learning this as a lifestyle rather than just a set of rules to apply sometimes.
…Born in creativity. Promoting and fostering individual creativity in teachers and students.

Written by: Richard M. Haney, Ph.D. (Counselling and Mediation)
Creator and Founder, Principal, Inglenook CHS, 1974
Apri 12, 2024

12/18/2023

CREATIVITY: WRESTLING WITH OUR DEMONS AND DAEMONS

For the Ancient Greeks it was important to take personal ownership of all the emotions, entities and Spiritual energies that we carry in our daily lives. That included the “dark forces” and destructive energies as well as the gentle and angelic entities and all the different archetypes in between those two poles.
All of these archetypes were called daemons by the Greeks. When the Christians came along 2,000 years ago, they attempted to cast out the dark side of individuals and proclaimed that it was an “outside demon entity” that drove folks into sin (the Devil). Thus, personal responsibility was down-played and redemption, guilt, confession and tithing flourished. The idea that “the Devil made me do it” was widespread. Basically, the Church disempowered its followers by offering to take care of their dark side ln return for an eternal pardon.

With clients and Partners-in-Healing who come to my practice,
I share that there are 4 ways of approaching an issue, situation or relationship that is challenging and/or perturbing:
Face it…Deny it…Hide from it…Run from it… The best approach is to face it. The worst is to run from it. Many people choose a combination of denying and hiding. Sometimes, of course, it is important to put the challenge on hold and then gradually resolve it. C.G. Jung has called this process of facing our demons and daemons “assimilating the dark side”. The early Greeks called it Khaos or Karos which basically meant staying very centered and present while juggling and balancing all of the various emotions, thoughts, actions and reactions.

When a person has become very adept at wrestling with all of these entities, they are then able to smoothly transition from their fate through to their destiny in a seamless way. They are able to maintain and navigate through a field of very creative life energy.

They become “emotionally available” for creative endeavours and very adept at manifesting their dreams, ideas and inspirations. They find it very easy to transcend their fears and their lethargy. At first the person feels like they are having “sparks of genius” or “flashes of inspiration” and only later does it become obvious that it is a new creative state of being.

C.G. Jung also wrote extensively on the concept of “instinctual truth”. He claimed that, although intuition is wrong as often as it is right, instinctual truth is virtually always right. Creative people seem to have “little people” inside of them that guide them in a direction that fits with exactly who they are. They are not fooled by tricksters or impersonators or bizarre fantasies. They stay true to their own dreams, wishes and inclinations.
They sense when a good entity, project, etc. comes along and they spontaneously jump right in. They engage with that energy with very strong faith and then follow through with conscious determination and perseverance. They practice “smart work”.

The ultimate state for the truly creative person is to be navigating continuously between fate and destiny in cadence with everything around them and maintaining an “ever-vigilant” path. This is called being a fully individuated person. It is not about applying a set of rules or striving for a set of goals. It is a state of being continuously and exactly oneself in each and every situation or event.

This article was written by:
Richard M. Haney, M.Ed., Ph.D. (Counselling and Mediation)
Richard has been practising Wholistic Counselling, Coaching, Hypnotherapy and Mediation for the past 25 years in Ottawa.
To contact Richard please call (613) 234-5678 or send an e-mail to: richard@ottawacounselling.com

07/01/2022

A new painting in my studio...My favorite place in the whole world....The Mississippi River in Blakeney just outside of Almonte, Ontario.

05/03/2022

Hey, folks, check out this wonderful workshop with Dorothy at Omega in New York from June 26 to July1. I have attended several of her workshops out in California. They are superb!! Richard

Relational Gestalt Practice with Dorothy Charles

It's hard to believe that I haven't sent out a mailing for two years and yet, here we are. I'm delighted that with the onset of longer days and Spring upon us, COVID numbers have decreased significantly and I'm feeling hopeful about doing some in-person groups. I will be teaching at Omega and Esalen as well as offering practice weekends in Aptos this spring and summer.

I'm looking forward to sitting in circle again and practicing with you. During group, we'll take time to look back at what we have each experienced in the past two years, come into contact with our here and now and create a way forward that is guided by Awareness, Choice, and Trust.

In order to meet in-person as safely as possible, I'm requiring that participants show proof of full vaccination plus a booster and a negative rapid test taken the first day of the workshop, prior to your arrival. We will be following CDC and local guidelines regarding mask-wearing. As those are ever-changing in response to real-time data, please come prepared to adapt to whatever is necessary under the current circumstance at the time of the workshop.

If practicing together would be a support, please take a look at the offerings and join me. Hope to see you very soon.

With love,
Dorothy
Relational Gestalt Practice 5-day at Esalen Institute
Experiencing and expressing emotions are integral to being alive. Learning to fully experience feelings and to express them in healthy ways enables us to have more pleasurable and fulfilling relationships.

Over the course of this workshop, we'll experiment with tracking our emotions, learn to recognize them as signals that call for awareness and attention, and develop our capacity to experience and express ourselves through the full range of our emotion. The workshop will include time for basic gestalt awareness practices, a mixture of didactic and experiential exercises, as well as individual open seat sessions with Dorothy and with the support of the group.

Dates: April 25-29, 2022

Click here to enroll.
Open Seat Intensive, May 2022
Open Seat is an individual Gestalt session that takes place in a group setting. When working you'll be supported in using the tools of Relational Gestalt Practice to contact your moment-to-moment experience. You may explore sensation and emotion, face life situations past and present, or practice your skills of self-expression and communication. This exploration may also include dreamwork and Gestalt experiments that involve the group's participation. Whatever the content, open seat is an interactive form that is used to develop awareness and self-responsibility. Periods of basic practice, continuum of awareness, experiential work and group sharing will be included.

*This workshop is open to those who have attended a previous Relational Gestalt Practice workshop with Dorothy, or done GAP with Christine Price

Dates: May 21-22, 2022

Cost: $300

Location: Aptos, CA

Please email registration@dorothycharles.com to register.
RGP at Omega, June 2022
Experiencing and expressing emotions are integral to being alive. Learning to fully experience feelings and to express them in healthy ways enables us to have more pleasurable and fulfilling relationships.

Over the course of this workshop, we'll experiment with tracking our emotions, learn to recognize them as signals that call for awareness and attention, and develop our capacity to experience and express ourselves through the full range of our emotion. The workshop will include time for basic gestalt awareness practices, a mixture of didactic and experiential exercises, as well as individual open seat sessions with Dorothy and with the support of the group.

Dates: June 26 - July 1, 2022

Click here to enroll.
RGP & Body Centered Awareness Practice Weekend, August 2022
co-led with Patrice Hamilton

This is an experiential workshop that blends slow, developmental movement explorations with individual and group Gestalt work to address how habitual, unconscious beliefs and behaviors formed early in life lead to habitual ways of responding that limit life experience.

Through mindfulness, explorations of forgotten movement patterns, and Relational Gestalt Practice, we contact the here-and-now, where change and growth are possible. As we become more present in our bodies, we may discover feelings we have been avoiding and come into greater contact with our sensory experience of those emotions. We can then learn to use those feelings as guides that help us live more authentically, moving beyond habits of being and relating that no longer serve us. In addition, changes in habitual muscular holding patterns result in a body that is better able to support changes made on any level—emotional, physical, or psychological.

*This workshop is open to those who have attended a previous Relational Gestalt Practice workshop with Dorothy, or done GAP with Christine Price

Dates: August 6-7, 2022

Cost: $300

Location: Aptos, CA

Please email registration@dorothycharles.com to register.
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04/27/2021

Mindfulness is about learning how to calm our mind and refocus our attention on the here and now so we can take on life’s challenges with a clear and steady outlook. To learn more about this practice and how it can benefit you, read on.

Mindfulness is about learning how to calm our minds and refocus our attention on the here and now. Learn more here.

04/23/2021

If you want to go further in your career, honing in on your leadership skills is a must. If you want to improve your leadership skills, here are a few ways to tap into your inner trailblazer.

If you want to go further in your career, improving your leadership skills is a must. Check out how to improve your leadership skills here.

04/08/2021

If you are seeking counselling for mental health issues, the improvements you will see will not only benefit your mental state but other parts of your life as well. You may be questioning if you could benefit from counselling. If you are, here are some ways to tell:

Counselling has so many benefits once you decide to take that step. Check out if you should seek counselling here:

04/06/2021

Meditating isn’t something that comes naturally to us as humans. The mind wandering during a meditation session is natural, especially when you are first practicing the habit. Learning to meditate will help you focus on yourself for just a few minutes a day, and has many benefits. Learn more here:

Learning to meditate for just a few minutes a day will help you focus on yourself and has many benefits. Check out those benefits here:

03/30/2021

Rather than focusing on one area of your health, like your physical wellbeing, holistic health factors in all areas, including emotional and mental health as well. It takes this interconnectedness into account to help a person achieve balance for their body, mind, and spirit. Read on to learn more about the benefits of holistic health and how it can help you.

To learn more about the benefits of holistic health and how it can help you in your everyday life, read on here!

03/25/2021

We are proud to announce that we are listed as one of the top 3 marriage counselors in Ottawa on ThreeBestRated.ca!

03/16/2021

If you’re not practicing healthy habits on a daily basis, it can be challenging to manage stress and anxiety and maintain a positive, balanced disposition. That’s why self-care is such an important habit to form, not only when we’re feeling mentally strained but always. Here are some healthy habits to start practicing today.

To maintain a healthy lifestyle, you need to create a habit of exercising regularly and eating a balanced, wholesome diet. Learn more here: