Michael Picucci Holistic Psychologist Private Practice

12/01/2022

True gentleness in healing has a warrior like quality to it. A gentle warrior — but a warrior nonetheless.

Our practitioners in Focalizing have to often educate our clients around the benefits of taking a gentle approach. And we have to learn to embody this ourselves for this to feel safe and available to our clients.

When we do this we are steering our clients away from two things that can get in the way of sustainable healing.

1. The desire to ‘heal fast’

This is when we, as practitioners, see clients seeking cathartic experiences or even looking at the practitioner as the 'one with all the answers'.

‘The slow way is the fast way’ is a phrase Michael often used and it describes much of the atmospheric feel of a Focalizing session.

This slow and gentle atmosphere is often the opposite energy of the velocity of the traumatic event that a client may be working with.

This velocity is often what fuels the desire to fix quick and to go against that desire takes a gentle determination from within both the practitioner and the client.

A radical act of gentleness.

2. The toxic wellness messages of ‘fixing’

It is hard to look anywhere in the wellness industry without seeing marketing messages heavily geared towards fixing.

Sure, many of your clients may want or desire to have more conscious relationships, easeful lives etc but the idea of fixing simply adds more shame and goes against one of the core conditions in Focalizing – no blame, no shame.

To go against this message of fixing takes a compassionate and curious practice — and a practitioner with a gentler approach to healing that doesn’t see healing as fixing the individual.

Core to Focalizing is that the practitioner is a human meeting another human with the belief that the individual’s innate inner wisdom can be brought forward in order to heal.

Another radical act of gentleness in healing.

Thanks for reading. If you're a therapist, coach, wellness practitioner or bodyworker, there's an opportunity to get trained in Focalizing practices in the new year. The Focalizing Practitioner program is a 10-week certification course in using trauma informed embodiment tools to help clients get unstuck, heal unprocessed trauma, and connect with life in a more purposeful manner. Starts in February and more information can be found here: https://www.theinstitute.org/the-practitioner-course
- The Focalizing Institute Team

11/23/2022

For wellness practitioners, therapists and coaches of all walks, burnout is quickly becoming one of the most common challenges clients arrive with.

Even if recovering from burnout isn't the primary goal of a person's healing process, it's often lurking around it.

Deep states of burnout can feel like the joy has been sucked out of life. It can feel like not having the energy for any of the things we used to love. It can make us socially reclusive, losing contact with friends or family. And it can sometimes be mistaken for depression or anxiety.

From a somatic perspective, burnout is nervous system dysregulation caused by chronic stress.

It is an imbalance whereby our output has far surpassed our inputs. We are giving away much more than we are taking in.

**A Focalizing Informed Way of Addressing Burnout**

When Focalizing Practitioners work with trauma, we start by understanding a person's level of resource. Does this person have the capacity to even be with the parts of them that are dysregulated, emotional or overwhelmed?

If not, it's time to focus on building up resources. The same is true for burnout.

**Step #1 - Examine Your Resources**

What are you presently using to rest and recover? Are they truly allowing you to recharge? Next time you engage with them, bring some curiosity in. At the end of watching a TV show, calling up a friend, or scrolling on your phone ask yourself, was that stress reducing, stress neutral or stress increasing? What's your nervous system telling you? Reduce what isn't helping you regulate wherever possible.


**Step #2 - Consider Bringing In New Resources**

Because burnout is a form of nervous system dysregulation, some of the most helpful resources are going to be ones that bring your body into experiences of safety, playfulness and presence.

If burnout is causing high activation (buzziness, anxiety, racing thoughts, trouble sleeping), look for down-regulating resources:

Examples: baths, yoga, massage, acupuncture, Reiki, creating art.

If burnout has you collapsed (joyless, no energy, no passion) look for up-regulating resources:

Examples: singing/chanting, intuitive movement and dance, light exercise, Qigong, cold plunges/showers.

Healing often looks like running a series of experiments and seeing what fits. In Focalizing for burnout recovery, we're looking for the resources that help bring more regulation to the nervous system.

What allows you to feel more yourself? What allows you to enjoy the present moment? What helps you have the energy to be social again? These are signs you're on the right track.

**Step #3 - Engage In Self Inquiry Around What Got You Here**

It is also helpful to take some time with a journal, a therapist or a coach to examine what got you here. For many, burnout is the end of a long road that started with feeling a deep sense of unworthiness.

In this instance, hard work becomes a strategy to attempt to overcome feeling unworthy. In essence, giving us a way to try to 'earn our place' in the world as if we didn't have one already.

This inquiry process deserves plenty of gentle compassion as it goes right to the core of our earliest experiences in the world. And at the same time, it sets us up to make better decisions when faced with the prospect of over extending ourselves in the future.

**One Last Thing: An Often Overlooked Opportunity For Resource...**

One of our favorite resources is utilizing our sense of smell as a playground for re-regulating our nervous system. For many, certain scents are enormously resourcing. A flower essence, a candle, an incense, or a favorite soap can all ground us in our senses and recalibrate our system.

This is important because deep states of burnout are essentially dissociative states. We dissociate from our senses and the world around us. Mindfully engaging with pleasant smells can be a shortcut to re-association, reconnecting with the present moment.

You likely know the saying to "stop and smell the roses" as a metaphor for appreciating life. There's a reciprocal effect to this that we witness in our nervous systems. Stopping to smell the roses also sends a signal back to our system that we're safe enough to be playful, connect with our surroundings, appreciate a moment free of hyper vigilance.

Next time you're feeling dysregulated and disconnected, consider a conscious pause to take in a resourceful scent. Notice what it does to your state and let it guide you back to yourself.

Thanks for reading. If you're a therapist, coach, wellness practitioner or bodyworker, there's an opportunity to get trained in Focalizing practices in the new year. The Focalizing Practitioner program is a 10-week certification course in using trauma informed embodiment tools to help clients get unstuck, heal unprocessed trauma, and connect with life in a more purposeful manner. Starts in February and more information can be found here: https://www.theinstitute.org/the-practitioner-course

- The Focalizing Institute Team

11/23/2022

Good Morning,

Today we are excited to share that in the coming weeks this page will be posthumously sharing content from Dr. Michael Picucci and the non-profit he co-founded.

Dr. Picucci co-created Focalizing, a body-focused trauma healing modality which built upon his work with Authentic Process Healing and Somatic Experiencing. He went on to co-found The Focalizing Institute 501(c)(3) (theinstitute.org) which has trained Focalizing practitioners working in 12+ countries.

This page will continue to promote his legacy, his unique healing process, and share upcoming opportunities to learn Focalizing for yourself.

Please join us in celebrating this next chapter ♥️

- The Focalizing Institute 501(c)(3)

12/16/2020

Today we’re writing to announce that Dr. Picucci’s non-profit, the Focalizing Institute, and trainer Nick Werber, are presenting a practitioner training starting in early 2021.

This is a 10 week certification course designed to teach students how to integrate Focalizing as both a self-healing practice and as a modality that can be facilitated for others.

Focalizing is the healing modality Dr. Picucci coined and co-developed along with several members of the Authentic Process Healing Institute many decades ago. It is a powerful modality that supports participants to develop a new relationship to their body; tapping into an innate wisdom that lives within it.

This holistic, body-based practice has helped hundreds of people struggling with the effects of trauma, addiction, sexual barriers, and more. Dr. Picucci’s no-shame, no-blame approach remains a breath of fresh air in a world where shaming and blaming has run rampant.

This program is designed for individuals seeking self healing, therapists, coaches and others currently working in helping fields. And is great for those who want to integrate new practices that are effective both online and in-person.

If you’re interested in learning more about Focalizing and this certification program, please visit the program page here: http://www.nicknwerber.com/focalizing-training-course

12/27/2018

Here's an update regarding Dr. Picucci's memorial along with his obituary which was published in the NYTimes this past Sunday. Read on for more information.

Dr. Michael Picucci's memorial will be held at The New York Open center on Sunday January 13th from 3-5pm. Location and directions can be found on The Open Center's website located here: www.opencenter.org.

----- Michael's Obituary -----
PICUCCI-Dr. Michael. Passed away peacefully at his home in Samsonville, NY on November 26, 2018. Michael was a pioneer in addiction, recovery and trauma resolution, especially in the LGBT community. He died of a cardiac event at 73 years of age following a long history of heart disease, said Dr. Elias Guerrero, his life partner of 26 years.

Born in Astoria NY, on September 25, 1945, Michael was raised in Bethpage and Amityville, NY. After a successful career in advertising and after recovering from a near fatal bout with AIDS-related Burkitt's lymphoma in 1983, he changed his life's direction and studied to become a counselor, eventually earning his Ph.D. from The Union Institute in Ohio.

An innovative psychologist and leading voice in his field for well over 35 years, Michael gained early recognition for his research in addiction and recovery, and as a trauma therapist trained in Somatic Experiencing. He was a co-founder of the LGBT Center ("The Center") in New York City and developed " Focalizing," a syncretic process influenced by his life's work and experience, in 1990 cofounding the Institute for Authentic Process Therapy, now the Focalizing Institute.

Dr. Picucci authored a seminal work on Stage Two Recovery, "The Journey to Complete Recovery" (North Atlantic) in 1996. He maintained a private practice for over 30 years and led workshops and retreats throughout the Northeast.

Dr. Picucci's clients, students, mentors, and friends cherished his enduring qualities of humility, humanity and a generosity of spirit. A memorial is planned for Sunday, January 13, 2019, at a location to be determined. Please check back at michaelpicucci.com for updates. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to two projects very close his heart: a gofundme campaign for one of his student's scholarship fund(www.gofundme.com/mindfulness-in-sports-for-kids) and the Focalizing Institute (www.theinstitute.org).

This obituary along with a guest book can be found on the NYTimes legacy site located here: https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/nytimes/obituary.aspx?n=michael-picucci&pid=191065038

11/28/2018

My name is Nick Werber, the project director of the Focalizing Institute and a colleague of Dr. Michael Picucci. I'm posting on his behalf.

I regret to inform you that Michael Picucci passed away on Sunday, November 25, 2018 after a long-time battle with a series of health challenges which included heart disease and the effects of four complex surgeries in the past three years. He was 73 years old.

Michael passed quietly in his home with his life partner of 26-years, Elias J. Guerro, MD at his side.

Following his wishes, there will be a memorial service in January 2019 at a location to be determined in the West Village. If you desire to speak with someone or have questions, you may reach out to me directly at nick@theinstitute.org.

If you are a client and are looking for therapy options, please contact me at the same email address and I can help direct you to the appropriate resources recommended by Michael.

In lieu of flowers, Elias and the Focalizing Institute are asking people to make donations to two worthwhile projects that were near and dear to Michael's heart:

First is Sam Faeder's 'Mindfulness In Sports For Kids' research fund (https://www.gofundme.com/mindfulness-in-sports-for-kids). Sam has been a brilliant student of Michael's for numerous years. His tenure as the director of a popular youth sports program in NYC inspired him to complete Ph.D. research on how mindfulness and complementary technologies like Focalizing support the social and emotional development of children. This is a worthy project for anyone who is interested in supporting the vibrancy of young lives.

Another beautiful tribute to Michael would be a donation to the Focalizing Institute in his honor. The Focalizing Institute is the non-profit Michael co-founded in 2000 and has existed for nearly two decades training therapists, teachers, and coaches in the Focalizing healing process. A donation to the Institute not only honors Michael's legacy, it enables the Institute to continue to train others in the life-changing approach Michael helped pioneer. Link: https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=CKG6WHE3HR8ZG&source=url

Thank you,

11/09/2018

~~~Online Therapy makes the cut.
Since 2003 I have witnessed how convenience, a deeper privacy, and a healing circle can be and is achieved doing virtual therapy.

As a Holistic Somatic online psychologist; my emphasis is 'Transcending Talk Therapy.' As the author of Focalizing, I utilize Skype, Facetime, and/or Zoom teleconferencing technology.

In-Person sessions are available near Woodstock, Ulster Cty, New York; also for retreats or training, PM me. Looking forward to meeting you. Check me out on Yelp.

Testimonials of Online Therapy: https://tinyurl.com/y89bc6xd

Dr. Michael Picucci's clients share their experiences with online therapy. Clients shown are from around the US and across the globe. To contact Dr. Picucci ...

08/21/2018

Announcing the early bird special for the upcoming weekend healing retreat and training on Focalizing!

If you register for this program before September 7th, you'll receive $100 off the total program cost: https://www.theinstitute.org/foundations-of-focalizing

Join a group of healers, therapists and individuals seeking personal growth who will sit in circle and learn how to apply Focalizing to themselves and others for life affirming healing benefits.

At this retreat, you'll learn why Focalizing is a lifeline for those who have struggled to find relief doing years or even decades of traditional therapy.

By the close, you'll leave refreshed and empowered to use the foundations of this healing modality as a self-healing approach or means of supporting those around you.

Part of what makes this retreat so special is the location. This all takes place at the historic and absolutely stunning Garrison Institute just 50 miles north of New York City.

To learn more about the program, schedule a free Focalizing demo to try it first, and to register for the retreat, follow this link: https://www.theinstitute.org/foundations-of-focalizing

08/14/2018

Announcing a new blog post about the challenges couples face if they choose to stay together and rebuild after an affair is discovered.

When a couple decides to do the work of healing and fostering trust again, redeveloping intimacy is critical to the longevity of the partnership.

However, it's also one of the toughest challenges they will face...

Click the link to learn more about healing after an affair and how zero-intimacy is not an option if the relationship is to survive in the long term.

For couples who choose to stay together after an affair, one of the most challenging aspects of the healing process is figuring out how intimacy develops again.

08/09/2018

The intention of this program is to enable you to facilitate the core elements of Focalizing for yourself and others. You'll learn why Focalizing is a lifeline for people who have struggled to find relief around issues of trauma, anxiety, depression, intimacy issues and more. And along the way, you'll develop your ability to integrate this healing technology into existing practices that you may already be doing on your own or with others.

We're so excited to be able to be hosting this event at the incredible Garrison Institute in the heart of the Hudson Valley. And as part of registration, all meals and lodging is included.

This program will not only give you a new tool for your toolbox, but a transformative personal journey that will leave you renewed and energized by the end. We hope you join us!

For more information and to learn how to register, please visit: https://www.theinstitute.org/foundations-of-focalizing

PS: We are offering free 40-minute demo Focalizing sessions for anyone who is considering the program. This way, you can receive a first-hand experience with the healing approach before you register. A blue drop-down appears at the link above that will show you how to alert us that you're interested.

08/09/2018

Nick Werber finds the best bits to share.
This one revolutionized my life at just the right time.

Whatever you’re feeling has a right to be. It belongs.
So much of Family Constellation healing work revolves around the simple understanding that every member of a family inherently belongs. And the moment this is violated like when a family member is ostracized or otherwise shunned, it creates a rift in the family. What’s surprising is that this rift actually continues to affect future generations in a variety of ways.

I’ve written about this idea in context of family and ancestry many times but here’s what I haven’t shared with you: The energy of a family system moves identically to the energy of your emotional and physiological systems.

What that means is that when we ostracize or otherwise resist a feeling we deem unworthy, it sticks around and continues affecting us. Allowing for feelings and giving them permission to be as they are (just like people), is what allows them to move towards existing in a healthier harmony.

Applying this to our emotions is counterintuitive to most of us, but it’s actually a major key to creating healing movements in our lives.

If you are struggling with a tough feeling, mental health issue like anxiety or depression, or even a physical challenge, try this and see if it starts a shift in your body and mind:

Close your eyes and connect with how your body feels.

Locate where in your body you feel the emotion or issue most.

Bring your awareness to that location in your body and learn a little more about the shape, texture or movement of it in your body.

Then say this to the feeling, either aloud or in your mind: “I honor your right to be here, you belong”

Then take a minute to honor it and give it permission to be. You can honor the feeling by watching it and giving it space with no agenda to change it, just like you would a child. Then just watch what happens.

This all comes back to that clever rhyme “what we resist, persists”

Give your feelings full permission to be, then watch how they change.